Raising Kanan

[Raising Kanan @GothamInks]

University of Nairobi always does it best

Otile brown #nadia mukami at 23

[Elon Musk @elonmusk]

@benswerd I have steak, eggs & coffee for breakfast everyday 🦾

[Raising Kanan @GothamInks]

@soccertorey Cancelo

[Moe @moneyacademyKE]

Kenya is set to spend up to Sh1 billion to host Bayern Munich and Ajax for a friendly match on January 5, 2027, to officially open Raila Odinga Stadium.

[Unnati @Unnati_builds24]

Whenever I feel demotivated i rewatch this...

Elon Musk in a living room in 2008, 12 days from bankruptcy, pitching a $109,000 car to people...

[Raising Kanan @GothamInks]

@KCBInKenya Why can't I withdraw money from KCB

[WARÚHIÚ @kamauwaruhiu]

Business idea , build a "highschool" somewhere in the middle of nowhere. With dorms ,mess halls ,classes and huge modern gyms . Admit men for a month where they live just like highschool but we foccus on fitness nutrition and skills .
Wake up at 6am and go for a 5km run ,come back shower and go for breakfast. Nutrion ni high lean protein low carbs . First lesson ni basic plumbing ,mechanics then some Ai skills . After lunch ni gym .Then jioni ni entertainment na phone time . Kulala by 9pm .
The next morning ni swimming by 6am , then lessons , music instruments and then nature walk . We would even have animals cows ,goats and chicken for them to take care of . All meat they eat they must slaughter themselves and chop the fire wood by hand . Hapa ukitoka hiyo mwezi ukue na skills na a good routine.
When men stay together their testestrone goes up .

[Moe @moneyacademyKE]

We have seen people asking who voted for the Bill.

The vote was conducted by acclamation, meaning there is no individual voting record showing how each MP voted.

[WARÚHIÚ @kamauwaruhiu]

A young man will see a beautiful old single woman and think his elders are blind .

[Mwendwa @Kelvinmwendwa__]

By the way, for those who ever secured remote jobs outside of Kenya, probably in the EU, USA, etc., please share the sites you used and any tips or tricks for landing one.

[RICH RETWEETS @mannupierre_]

Wenye Wamesota sana Kimbia M-shwari dial *334# , Loan And Savings Then Refresh Limit Upewe Loan Sai😂👌

[Moe @moneyacademyKE]

Here is how QuickMart succeeded in Kenya’s retail market.

Thread below:

[Moe @moneyacademyKE]

We have also shared a step-by-step guide on how to buy shares through Ziidi Trader on the MyOneApp in a previous thread.

Check it out below:https://t.co/5KroMPragD

[Moe @moneyacademyKE]

Lastly, here is how you can apply for QuickMart shares.

Visit https://t.co/cUYR4lMNdm before the offer closes on October 30, 2026, at 5pm EAT.

The minimum application is 500 shares, costing Sh3,750.

[Raising Kanan @GothamInks]

@_fels1 Bamburi mwisho and fisheries hakuna kulala

[Raising Kanan @GothamInks]

@Goddie_Ke Mkujie accounts hapa

[Raising Kanan @GothamInks]

@elonmusk Can't wait

[Moe @moneyacademyKE]

The future of cars is getting wild.

Elon Musk has officially unveiled Tesla’s next-generation Roadster.

It is set to feature:
— An all-electric powertrain with rocket thrusters
— The ability to launch off a ramp and flip in midair
— Thrusters designed for brief lift-offs
— 0–60 mph in under 1 second (claimed)
— A top speed above 230 mph (claimed)
— Active aerodynamics
— A suction system for driving upside down

[iQwatson @iQwatson]

ALWAYS DATE YOUNGER WOMEN
End of discussion.
Not because you want control
but because women your age are emotionally depleted.
They don’t bond.
They budget.
Years of bad decisions taught them one rule:
Never give a man your best again.
So they arrive guarded, jaded, and transactional.
Affection has conditions.
Sex has leverage.
Peace has a price.
They don’t feel first.
They audit first.
You’re not a man to desire
you’re a contingency plan.
A hedge against loneliness.
A résumé slot labeled “stable enough.”
They speak in therapy terms because raw emotion scares them.
They call it “boundaries.”
It’s really fear dressed as wisdom.
Younger women haven’t been hollowed out yet.
They haven’t learned to ration femininity.
They still respond to certainty, strength, and direction
not negotiations and disclaimers.
Older women want commitment before desire.
Younger women feel desire because of the man.
One wants security.
The other wants you.

Choose accordingly..

[George T. Diano @georgediano]

FELLOW WALALA HOII! Love has landed our boy right in the middle of DUST that came in form of cyclone Hidaya. A young man by the name of Kiptoo has been left throwing his hands in the air while inhaling sandy soil after Joan, the girl he sponsored to study in the UK updated her relationship status from married to singoo pale Facebook.

Our boy sold his ancestral land, the very fertile land his great grandfather left behind after fighting colonialists, to educate Joan in the UK. According to their WhatsApp chats, the man had already allocated names for his future pikiins with joan.

The wedding was already on schedule once daughter of Agrippina jets back from the UK. Unfortunately Joan landed at Heathrow Airport, took one look at the British weather, breathed in some fresh air, and suddenly developed amnesia.

The man who had sold land to finance her dreams became a stranger overnight. Calls went unanswered, WhatsApp messages developed a terminal illness, and finally a text arrived while splashing kitungu juice, informing him that she had moved on with her life.

Our boy saw marudurudu together with birds of Ngethe ayaaam telling you. Kiptoo financed the flight, but another man has apparently been shortlisted for the soft landing. Daughter of Agrippina is currently enjoying horizontal engineering with colonizers while kiptoo is left staring at poverty with his sanpanku eyes.

Our boy has since relocated his headquarters to Barwesa wines & spirit where he spends his days irrigating his throat with premium ethanol while playing Bahati Bukuku's Dunia Haina Huruma on repeat through his katululu.

When the song reaches the emotional parts, Kiptoo starts to remove balloons through his nose. The saddest part is that He has nothing to show for his investment except an empty bank account, a broken heart, and a short sleeved makagare that has since refused to rise past nusu mlingoti.

Joan has a British education, Kiptoo has a British experience. The only ancestral land that he had planted managu, kunde & misheveve was officially converted into a foreign exchange programme. Simps will always learn the hard way.

During our daily sermons, I've always insisted that the only woman you can empower is your daughter or maybe your mother. Look at our boy now, amebaki matako wazi.

The good news is that Kiptoo is set to join our prestigious Kalahari Desert University of Science & Technology (K-DUST), where he will pursue a Bachelor's Degree in Dust Mitigation with a minor in Emotional Damage Management.

His first lecture will cover Advanced Techniques in Inhaling Dust After Failed Foreign Investments. May Yehova Wanyonyi remember his poor pipoos in that thing called Mareej aki. And may he protect our sons from more international heartbreaks. Kama kawa sisi walala hoii hatuna maoni, Letu Jicho tu.👀

[Moe @moneyacademyKE]

A new report has emerged that three fraudsters allegedly created more than 62,800 fake invoices worth Sh42 billion between 2020 and 2025, involving 72 companies.

The invoices were used to help businesses pay less tax or claim VAT refunds.

[If approved, the claims would have resulted in KRA paying out about Sh4 billion in fraudulent VAT refunds].