Anne 🐗🐍🦃

Phoenix Apologist | Competent Huntress | Can’t Sing and Dance But Can Walk | Forever in Pursuit of the Noble Javelina | Just Be Sayin’ Shit

[Anne 🐗🐍🦃 @GovernorAnne]

For the most part I am actually really enjoying my single era but every time I see that a recipe serves 4 and adjust the serving to 0.5 I see the hat man in my dreams that night

[Anne 🐗🐍🦃 @GovernorAnne]

@w0rm_face 🥰🐗

[Anne 🐗🐍🦃 @GovernorAnne]

Just overheard two guys arguing and one shouted at the other “How about you go suck some dick for fent and die” which I am now going to photoshop over a picture of a kitten and turn into a poster

[Anne 🐗🐍🦃 @GovernorAnne]

I wonder how effective body part rhetoric really is for the pro-life movement. Like I get it, you love baby feet, who doesn’t? But you know what I don’t love? Poverty and Kyle from Tinder in that order

[×͜× @RuggedRyan_]

Stop having Abortion Ladies! It is an act of violence. Deadly violence.

[Anne 🐗🐍🦃 @GovernorAnne]

@jumbogoblin 💙💙💙

[Anne 🐗🐍🦃 @GovernorAnne]

Nothing I hate more than a bitch who honks at me when I’m waiting to take a right at a red light. I will proceed into the street when it is safe. Usually, in the fifth largest city in America, this tends to happen when the light is GREEN,

[Anne 🐗🐍🦃 @GovernorAnne]

@popejoan2 Like, I am also tired of waiting around on mythical “resources” that never come to fruition, and exhausted that when I’m like “A homeless guy groped me today” there’s always somebody waiting to say “UNHOUSED!” so I can’t blame idiots for being swayed into voting for Pratt over it

[Anne 🐗🐍🦃 @GovernorAnne]

We know that Pratt is an idiot and we know that he does not have the credentials to govern, but we should take his proximity to victory as an indication of the fatigue critical swing- or could-be-swung voters have about having to deal with mentally unwell men prowling the streets

[Anne 🐗🐍🦃 @GovernorAnne]

@popejoan2 I think the homeless epidemic is so emblematic of every wedge issue the left always loses on: “I know your eyes see X, and I know your anecdotal experience is Y, but just elect us and we have actionable policy plans for Z that will never get passed” has not worked well for us

[Anne 🐗🐍🦃 @GovernorAnne]

TikTok algorithm targeting the wrong audience once again

[Anne 🐗🐍🦃 @GovernorAnne]

@KMAG_YOLO (I mean that in a "making the world a better place pays like ass" way unfortch)

[Anne 🐗🐍🦃 @GovernorAnne]

Be kind to everybody, for you never know who is currently trying to wean their two cats off of morning wet food

[Anne 🐗🐍🦃 @GovernorAnne]

@KMAG_YOLO I did the math and realized 2 cans a day per cat x 2 cats = 120 cans a month which is like a $125/month subscription to feeding two animals born on a porch on 27th avenue and Indian school, but my cats don’t understand that mommy works a Change The World Job and earns accordingly

[Anne 🐗🐍🦃 @GovernorAnne]

@code_mom_ I hate when you can tell they’re honking as if to say “You totally could’ve made that!” Ok it’s not my fault the guy barreling towards me at 65mph in a 35mph zone decided to drop it to a snail’s pace in case I decided to whip out in front of him!!!

[Anne 🐗🐍🦃 @GovernorAnne]

Something that happens more often than you’d expect when you say the name for the order is “Anne with an E”

[Anne 🐗🐍🦃 @GovernorAnne]

@Ruesavatar @fillefoux Everybody on wildlife biology and hunting twitter was like “yeah that’s why you shouldn’t own exotic animals” and everybody on vaguely libertarian to far right edgelord tech twitter was like “the GOVERNMENT shouldn’t kill my hypothetical SQUIRREL” yes it should!!! #NeverForget

[Anne 🐗🐍🦃 @GovernorAnne]

@Ruesavatar @fillefoux Oh back when that pornstar’s squirrel had to get its head lopped off to test for rabies I became Person of the Day on Edgelord Internet for my apparently bootlicking stance that if you own an exotic rabies vector and it bites somebody you need to accept when it gets rabies tested

[Anne 🐗🐍🦃 @GovernorAnne]

@Ruesavatar @fillefoux I do not wish hateful things on her family (that squirrel really did need to get beheaded by the government though) but I do find it annoying when people are all “you’re not doing enough to meet your person” as if it’s not musical chairs like sorry I haven’t tried being a c** rag

[Anne 🐗🐍🦃 @GovernorAnne]

@Charlesaf3 @stqnfield Nothing makes me roll my eyes harder than “anti status quo,” populism working requires the populace to not be overwhelmingly stupid

[Anne 🐗🐍🦃 @GovernorAnne]

@fillefoux Bingo

[Anne 🐗🐍🦃 @GovernorAnne]

@ClueHeywood Don’t bring me into this