Guys Minds

Humorous tweets, jokes, one-liners and often questionable words of wisdom, all at your fingertips.

[Guys Minds @GuysMindz]

Remember making up fake rules when there was a substitute teacher?

[Guys Minds @GuysMindz]

That awkward moment when you gently toss your phone on your bed and it decides to bounce off 3 walls, knock down 2 lamps, and kill a cat.

[Guys Minds @GuysMindz]

70 ways to make a woman happy: No. 1 is shopping and the rest is '69'

[Guys Minds @GuysMindz]

Oh, you have people liking your stuff on Facebook? Wish I was as cool as you.

[Guys Minds @GuysMindz]

Oh, you're girlfriend is really hot? It's too bad she's a slut.

[Guys Minds @GuysMindz]

Oh you disguise your name on Facebook? You must have so many stalkers.

[Guys Minds @GuysMindz]

Oh, how do five gay guys walk? In one direction.

[Guys Minds @GuysMindz]

Gorgeous, intelligent, kind, sweet, charming, witty, hilarious, friendly, well enough about ME! How are you?

[Guys Minds @GuysMindz]

Oh, ya'll broke up for good? Can't wait to see you both back together next week.

[Guys Minds @GuysMindz]

Oh, you're 15, with a child, smoking, and blowing different guys? Your parents must be so proud of you.

[Guys Minds @GuysMindz]

The problem with Crocs is that people wear them.

[Guys Minds @GuysMindz]

Oh, all men are jerks? I'm sure you're a saint yourself.

[Guys Minds @GuysMindz]

Oh, you find music before everyone else? You be a professional music finder.

[Guys Minds @GuysMindz]

Oh, you're going to drop out of high schoo? I'll be you'll be really successful in life.

[Guys Minds @GuysMindz]

My ex is living proof as to how stupid I can be.

[Guys Minds @GuysMindz]

I lent some blind guy money the other day. He said he was gonna pay me back next time he saw me� Wait�

[Guys Minds @GuysMindz]

You've really got to hand it to short people. Because they often can't reach it.

[Guys Minds @GuysMindz]

Oh, you rhymed bottles with models? You must be the most talented emcee to ever pick up a mic.

[Guys Minds @GuysMindz]

Keeping a can of gray spray paint in your car is a lot cheaper than a ticket for parking in the red zone.

[Guys Minds @GuysMindz]

We live in an era of smart phones and stupid people.