Halliru Habib

Abusite.|
Human Right Activist.| Good Governance Advocate.|

Opinions are mine.

[Dan Bello @BelloGaladanchi]

How to Marry Two More Wives When You Can’t Feed the First One (A Step-by-Step Guide to Nigerian State Creation)

There’s a special kind of genius that only exists in Nigeria. A political kind of madness that should be patented and exported as a natural resource. These people can’t pay N-Power youths. They can’t release police retirees from the hellfire called PENCOM. They can’t create jobs. They can’t protect lives. But somehow — by the grace of greed and the gospel of waste — they’ve found the spiritual energy to create more states.

Ladies and gentlemen, Nigeria is about to have more wives — sorry, states!

Step 1: Redefine “Development”

Development, in the Nigerian dictionary, no longer means roads, schools, hospitals, or jobs.
No, my friend.
It now means new letterheads, new logos, and fresh coat-of-arms designs, with the governor’s nephew in charge of the printing contract.

You can’t fix a classroom roof, but you can build a new assembly complex with Italian marble.
You can’t pay teachers, but you can approve a ₦2 billion “State Inauguration Gala.”
We call this “strategic mismanagement.”

Step 2: Multiply Failure Efficiently

Creating new states is not about solving problems — it’s about distributing them evenly.
One broke governor becomes two broke governors.
One looting legislature becomes three legislative viruses.
You had one convoy blocking traffic? Congratulations — you now have seven.
This is democratic duplication of dysfunction.

Step 3: Cook With the People’s Hunger

Imagine a man who can’t feed his wife and two children, standing proudly to announce he will marry two more wives.
Not for love. Oh no. For prestige.
He believes hunger will respect him more if it sees more plates on the table.

That, right there, is Nigerian logic in motion.
We are expanding our poverty to make it look like progress.

Step 4: Ignore Reality, Embrace Decoration

The roads are craters. Classrooms are ruins. Hospitals are haunted.
Teachers, soldiers, and police officers live like refugees in their own land.
Youth unemployment is higher than the country’s moral standards.

But worry not, they are working hard…
to draw new maps.
Because apparently, new borders cure old stupidity.

Step 5: Add Committees to Committees

Instead of paying police pensions, buy more siren SUVs.
Instead of fixing school roofs, add curtains to new offices.
Instead of building factories, form committees and subcommittees,
then create a committee to “oversee committee formation.”

We now have Special Assistants, Senior Special Assistants, Personal Assistants,
and the Special Assistant to the man who carries the bag of the Personal Assistant.
Nigeria’s job creation plan is working, just not for you.

Step 6: Master the Art of Political Theatre

Governance in Nigeria is a Netflix special, same plot, new season.
Actors change, but the script remains: steal, smile, and swear to serve.
They’ve tied government appetite to the pockets of the poor,
turning citizens into a national soup pot that politicians dip into whenever policy feels hungry.

And every election season, they call it democracy stew.

Step 7: Build the Golden Roof on the Broken House

Before you split a town in two, fix the granary.
Before you marry more wives, feed the children.
Before you add chairs in the assembly, fix the broken ones in classrooms.

But no, they insist on building a golden roof on a cracked foundation.
A shining disaster waiting to collapse, but hey, it photographs well!

The Final Truth Bomb

Let’s call it what it is:
This is not governance. It’s theatre with tears.
This is not reform. It’s recycling of rot.
This is not nation-building. It’s ego management with budget allocation.

And every time they announce a new state, a poor man somewhere in Nigeria whispers:

“Ah, maybe this new state will finally bring development.”

No, my brother. It will bring more convoys, more curtains, more committees — and one extra anthem to sing before they steal again.

[Mahdi Shehu @shehu_mahdi]

THE IRONY OF PRESIDENTIAL FORGIVENESS, CLEMENCY, PERDON ETC.

When drug barons are granted amnesty, drugs will continue to flow again and it gives hope to barons to continue with the hope of amnesty if caught.

When treasury looters are forgiven, they will rejoin their families and enjoy the loot and looting will continue because amnesty is being anticipated.

When willful and serial murderers are forgiven, more murders will be committed because amnesty is in the offing.

When destructive national assets vandals are forgiven, more vandals will be emboldened because clemency is around the corner.

When the legal or constitutional provisions are compromised and deployed to achieve an aim or a purpose, more irreparable injury will be done to the legal, political and economic systems. Countries with such inclinations always lag behind.

[Halliru Habib @HabibHalliru]

@Bashlawal7 💯

[Halliru Habib @HabibHalliru]

Believe me or not, Nigerians were taught how to hate, how to celebrate the downfall, and even the demise of others. Now that they are transmogrified into full-blown haters, they turn back to hate, bash, and even celebrate the passing away of their tutors.

[Halliru Habib @HabibHalliru]

Lesson:
Ingratitude isn't a virtue that should be traded publicly.

#TRUTHHURTS💯

[Prof™ @OOlusore]

In the early hours of 29th May 2023,
FUEL was ₦197/Liter
EXCHANGE RATE was ₦460/$

Just in case you have forgotten.

[Amnesty International Nigeria @AmnestyNigeria]

Amnesty International calls for an immediate and transparent investigation of lynching of at least 16 travelers whose vehicle was blocked and all of them dragged one by one: beaten and then set ablaze by the vigilante and armed youth yesterday at Uromi Edo state.

[MS Ingawa @MSIngawa]

Until this very moment I have not been able to finish watching that heartbreaking and horrible video of burning people alive in Edo State. This is one of the most horrific moments in this 2025.

Only anima!s can justify this barbaric action.

[Comrade Abiyos Roni. @AbbaM_Abiyos]

I wonder which kind fight of corruption we are doing in Nigeria🤔

The criminal ones are walking freely with police guarding them while the innocent ones are persecuted and jailed.

#FreeProfUsmanYusuf

[Farooq Kperogi @farooqkperogi]

In this week's column, I reflect on my experience with refueling my car here in Atlanta and realizing that Nigerians with a minimum wage of about $43 per month--in an oil-producing country--pay more for petrol than people in the Atlanta area. https://t.co/kiA55coXLj

[oseni rufai @ruffydfire]

It took 51 years for dollars to move from $1 to N461. It took 1 year to move from N461 to N1,743. Copied

[Halliru Habib @HabibHalliru]

Nobody gives a damn about the past, whether true or lie. Instead, why don't you guys debunk his claim by showing the whole nation what you achieved so far? Nigerians are already fed up with the lies, deceit and propaganda being peddled by this administration & the ruling party.

[The Guardian Nigeria @GuardianNigeria]

Obasanjo spent $16b to generate darkness in Nigeria – Presidency

https://t.co/cyNyOlkS9N

[Halliru Habib @HabibHalliru]

#NewProfilePic

[Dan Bello @BelloGaladanchi]

Tulumbu and Dangote to devour Nigeria’s poor

[Abdul-Aziz Na'ibi Abubakar @jrnaib2]

I don't even waste my time to listen to President Bola Tinubu's speech, I know it would be an empty speech as usual.

[Halliru Habib @HabibHalliru]

@jrnaib2 Of course empty. As always!

[Sarkin Mota @SarkinMota_AMF]

No governor (ever) in Nigeria can boast of doing the same standard of classroom Dan Bello did with less than 5M.
We need to start holding our governors accountable for the bad governance we’re facing, Our governors are thieves !

[Halliru Habib @HabibHalliru]

Consequently, We should learn to be responsible for our actions if we so wish to progress. we can not shift the blame for the damage caused by our handiwork onto others. Period!

@inecnigeria
@officialEFCC
#EndBadGovernanceInNigeria
#SupremeCourt
#FearlessInOctober

[Halliru Habib @HabibHalliru]

Rigging is made easier when the simple-minded among us get induced with noodles, cups of rice, money and other frivolous items at polling units just for them to vote for the most unfit candidate in return.

[oseni rufai @ruffydfire]

In my country bandits play on TikTok while protesters languish in Jail.