Katen Kyōkotsu

I drink and I know things

[Matt🍫 @jbmillenial]

My penis is now penwas due to lack of usage

[Ryanair @Ryanair]

no fly list

[Cooper Lawrence @CooperLawrence]

“Runaway brides” should be called “near Mrs.”

Thank you, this is why I have a PhD

[𝐌𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐊 @TheMahleek]

If he pours a little of every beer into the same cup, can we call it the World Cup??

[44🇫🇷🇦🇷🇵🇹 @NurseLekan]

This is equivalent to 9 teams from Epl going to Europe and Chelsea still couldn’t make it

[Ridwan Oke @RidwanuLlah]

You see the trio of Madrid, Athletico Madrid and Barcelona, they are bunch of funny clubs who would do anything to compete. Madrid made that offer to satisfy their President’s promise of offering 150M for a player knowing that Athletico would reject while at the same time ensuring Barca can’t offer less and ultimately doesn’t get the player they want.

[Atlético de Madrid @Atleti]

😂😂😂😂😂

[MaziTundeEdnutfan @originalproflle]

BREAKING NEWS🚨 A Federal High Court just declared the National Assembly’s ₦110 billion vehicle and allowance scheme unlawful. ₦40 billion went to 465 bulletproof cars — ₦305 million each. ₦70 billion went to “support allowances” for lawmakers.

The judge called it self-dealing. Meaning... the people who approved the money are the same people who benefit from it. But the budget was approved back in 2023. So the real question is... who’s going to collect the cars and money back?

📺 : iswellthecapitalist

[Alpha @Tamunogbubemi]

It is a story, not a joke and probably not intended to be funny. Not stereotypical as well, unless one is eager to be outraged. Nothing about the story sounds false or fabricated.

[Boondu @boondu_Sneh]

I'm disgusted with how Nigerians like to simplify the rot in our society instead on focusing on how to fix our problem.

Did drivers in Nigeria try to scam Uber or not? Who cares whether the rest of the world did it or not?

What manner of goalpost shifting is this?

[Full ML Alchemist @unironictechbro]

well

[Xcellent @Xcellent70]

Matchday 1 penalty to Portugal
Matchday 2 penalty to Portugal
Matchday 3 penalty to Portugal

Ro of 32 penalty to Portugal
Ro of 16 penalty to Portugal, Spain elimination
Quarterfinals penalty to Portugal, Argentina elimination

Semi final 3 penalties to Ronaldo
Final 1 tap in,1 red card to opponent and 2 penalties to Ronaldo

[Babalola Esq.⚖️ @Owiggy_]

If your father discovers that his own father is not actually his biological father, does that make you a grand bastard?

[Italian 🚅🇮🇹🇻🇦 @Italian347]

In the beginning was the.... Word, you say?

[Juss.mercy❤️‍🩹 @nwidele]

Hope say na power rangers i dey see so

[Bremen @Rxbremen]

You called your uncle to send you something, saying school was choking. He sent you 5k, in 2016, and you were like “just 5k”.

Now that you are working, they sent you message on WhatsApp you off read receipt, Oghenekaro reply that boy.

“That boy calls you uncle, do not starve him”

[Cross˚ @Elkrosmediahub]

Has he visited the families of the 46 kidnapped kids?

[The Husky @Mr_Husky1]

A 24-year-old Polish tennis player arrived in Paris last week ranked 114th in the world, with no sponsors, no guaranteed income, and no certainty she could even pay for her hotel room.

She had to win three qualifying matches just to enter the French Open main draw. Prize money is only paid at the end of the tournament, so a Polish sports drink brand quietly stepped in and covered her hotel bill.

Her name is Maja Chwalinska. And today, she plays in the French Open final.

Before this tournament, she had won exactly one Grand Slam main draw match in her entire career. She had battled depression so severe that in 2021 she couldn't get out of bed. She underwent knee surgery in 2022. She spent years grinding through small tournaments across Europe just to stay afloat.

Then she arrived in Paris, won three qualifiers, and kept winning. Zheng Qinwen. Elise Mertens. Maria Sakkari. Diana Shnaider. Nine straight matches. One set dropped.

She is now the first qualifier in French Open history to reach the final. The last time a qualifier reached a Grand Slam final, it was Emma Raducanu at the 2021 US Open. Raducanu won.

By simply making the final, Chwalinska has earned more prize money than her entire career combined. The runner-up cheque alone is $1.6 million. If she wins today, she takes home $3.25 million.
One week ago she couldn't pay for her hotel room.

[Obasanjo @cent_haysmall]

Sharia police were seen beating non Muslims for eating publicly during Ramadan in northern part of Nigeria

Ori yin ti buru.