HardWorkinIt

[HardWorkinIt @HardWorkinIt]

I wish my gf would STOP PLAYING GAMES. Surprise visits and strip billiards are SO IMMATURE. Surprise shotgun weddings, OTOH? Totals adult!

[HardWorkinIt @HardWorkinIt]

Road trip! VEGAS, BABY! … baby?

[HardWorkinIt @HardWorkinIt]

My gf is so busy that I haven’t been getting what I need lately. Springing a surprise marriage on her in Vegas WILL SOLVE EVERYTHING!!!

[HardWorkinIt @HardWorkinIt]

@PowerOfTheClam WTH, this show has already robbed me of my dignity. BRING IT.

[HardWorkinIt @HardWorkinIt]

@PowerOfTheClam Girls are stupid. Let’s get drunk.

[HardWorkinIt @HardWorkinIt]

Since my gf abandoned me on V-Day, I’m going to go get drunk with Girl I Hardly Know Who’s Banging @PowerOfTheClam.

[HardWorkinIt @HardWorkinIt]

Valentine’s Day was invented by Ilene Chaiken as a ploy to get lesbians to pay for Showtime.

[HardWorkinIt @HardWorkinIt]

@RealiestPAPI @PowerOfTheClam My dick is still the biggest!

[HardWorkinIt @HardWorkinIt]

The stage I needed for my LA Fashion Week show just went POOF. Is it because my dick isn’t big enough?

[HardWorkinIt @HardWorkinIt]

Time to flirt with my employees, pout that my gf is late getting here, and challenge my new biz contacts to a dick measuring contest!

[HardWorkinIt @HardWorkinIt]

Hollywood Chamber of Commerce induction night, baybee! I paid mah dues! I'm IN! Why? Because like my hero Billy Madison, I AM AWESOME!

[HardWorkinIt @HardWorkinIt]

I’m gonna make LA Fashion Week my bitch. HARD. Why? Because my dick is GINORMO!

[HardWorkinIt @HardWorkinIt]

@PowerOfTheClam My dick and your dick walk into a bar and the bartender says to my dick, “Sir, you can’t bring your kid in here.” HAHA.

[HardWorkinIt @HardWorkinIt]

I don’t take any guff at work! And when we get home from our 12-hour days, my gf better get in the kitchen and MAKE ME SOME PIEH!

[HardWorkinIt @HardWorkinIt]

I’m a gay man trapped in a lesbian’s body. And I like really feminine girls. Does that make me butch? Whatevs. I’m a big (Mr.) Softy.