Henshman

just here to have a yarn

[frostandfurious @Nick_Frost]

Nelly Furtado claimed she was "like a bird", however she also claimed to be a "maneater", so it doesn't take a paleontologist or ornithologist to deduce that Nelly Furtado is in fact a Velociraptor

[Nia 🌸 @Niawins_]

not to brag but what a time to be childless

[star6!*☆ @seanecd]

That one conversation where you realise that you’re definitely gonna fuck each other >>

[Dear Son. @DearS_o_n]

Dating a woman who gets excited like a kid every time she’s around you is one of the best decisions a man can make.

[Fav @favwontmiss]

Millennials really made burned CDs for people as an act of love. Handwritten track list, sharpie decorations, songs illegally downloaded from somewhere questionable. That was INTIMACY.

[val ³⁴ ۶۟ৎ @vawiee_]

pon tus nacadas de buzz ball y vape lejos de mi hijo lo estamos criando con tequila puro y malboro rojo

[Fav @favwontmiss]

Young millennials (90-96), Does anyone else feel like we lived three lifetimes before 30?

[Henshman @Henshman140]

Always compliment strangers on style. Observant to nice garms

[🧸 @mygirlystuff2]

Sometimes I forget how different men and women are until my boyfriend wears the new jacket I got him to work and I ask him “did the other guys compliment your jacket”

[salute @saluteAUT]

if you as a dj are pure of heart you can mix 2 out of key songs together and they'll still sound good. if they sound bad you have some evil in you and just need to work on yourself a little more.

[Aelin 🗡️ @linnssins]

not all angels are in heaven, for example im on the porch smoking a marlboro red

[CyberMysticGarden - Marcelo Pinel @cybermistic]

🚴🚴‍♂️🚴‍♀️

[julia @juumelo_]

sometimes therapy is just having beers with your most retarded friends

[Moses @Mozes60]

BREAKING:
Scientists confirm that an ADHD partner will unconsciously pick a random, stressful argument 20 minutes before leaving for a vacation, a date night, or a road trip—just to manufacture enough adrenaline to survive the transition.
Researchers baffled.
ADHD couples packing the car in icy silence: "Every single trip."

Here is why the "Pre-Vacation Fight" happens, and how to stop it before it ruins your weekend:

[nebulica @nebulica]

“Geometry is the purest form of physics.”

— Albert Einstein

[​𝐥𝐲𝐫𝐚 @sunnkssdseraph]

Social media has kinda ruined whole generation. Men are out here drooling over women they'll never even meet, and women are stressing out over lifestyles they can never pay for. Husbands are losing interest in their own wives because they can't stop looking at strangers online, and wives are losing respect for their husbands because they're always measuring their normal life against someone else's highlight reel. Regular marriages now feel like total flops, loyal partners feel like they aren't enough, and cozy homes start to feel like traps. We've built a group of people who mix up basic lust with actual love, expensive stuff with true happiness, and random online likes with feeling good about themselves. And the scariest part is that people are messing up the genuinely good things they already have just because they're hooked on the fake lives of total strangers. Social media isn't just wasting your hours. It's actually training you to dislike your own life.

[G Jones @gjonesbass]

look i’m happy every time i see a republican lose but the fact that elon spent almost a QUARTER BILLION trying to defeat this guy and still lost 😭🙌

[Viktor👽 @FB_viktor]

There’s something aesthetically pleasing about lighting a joint or a cig. That head tilt and the hand covering the fire to prevent the wind from blowing it out. +1000 aura points