i can't believe i just found out about the zamboni driver of the caps who sparks one up while he's resurfacing the ice. I have no idea if this is public knowledge, im not trying to blow up this guys spot because he only smokes a black n mild in front of 18,000 a night so idk if anyone knows about it but this is fucking awesome. I am just thinking to myself how funny it is that this guy is toking dope while operating heavy machinery that requires you to pay attention to flooding the ice for an NHL hockey game. I don't know if it's weed but it's funnier for the story if it is. there's no way in hell there isn't sub woofers under the hood of this zamboner either, i can tell by looking at this picture he has "I Tried" by bone thugs n harmony blasting at max volume while whipping around the ice with somebody's daughter or girlfriend that signed up to sit on the zamboni. First zamboni with spinners. first zamboni the police tried to pull over for no reason but claim it was for failure to use the blinker. Ok maybe thats crossing the line i'll stop. but imagine you sign your daughter up to go sit on the zamboni for a ride in between periods. You watch her climb into the seat, fasten her seatbelt. A PR person tells her to have fun and smiles at her. Then the zamboni driver drives away and starts his lap, and you walk up against the glass with your hot wife to take a picture of your daughter on the zamboni. Then as the zamboni makes its way back towards you you get ready to take a picture of your daughter with your phone and all of a sudden you see a massive cloud of smoke and you're like ??? is the zamboni engine on fire? no. its not. you look at the conductor and the dude is smoking a huge blunt while driving the zamboni. you look around to the PR person and you're like yo the zamboni guy is smoking ??? and the PR person looks at you and is like, yeah, is there a problem? then you look around like trying to figure out of you're the only one that has an issue with it. even your wife is like honey calm down all the zamboni drivers smoke blunts while they resurface the ice. You're like wtf? It feels like a nightmare. this guy is blowing tons of weed smoke directly in your 6 year old daughters face, unintentionally, during her entire zamboni drive. everything goes black.
18 years later you wake up. you're at home. you get a phone call, it's your daughter. She lives in Jamaica. you once again beg her to come back home and live in the USA. she says dad i cant do that im a rastafarian and you say no you're not, just because you live in jamaica and bang a guy that owns a jetski rental company doesn't mean you're a rastafarian you're literally a white chick from the suburbs of maryland can you please come. and then she says, i need to smoke and think about it. ill let you know later. you say ok.
growing up on the big island my uncle always told me “ʻO ke kauwela kēia o ke keiki keʻokeʻo, inu“ which means “It is the summer of the white boy, drink up”