Mind of a Black Man

If I die tonight remember me for all the good I've done.

I'm just joking. Clear the history on all my electronic devices! Thanks

[Mind of a Black Man @ImNotJayson]

@trapsntrunks Qqoo

[Mind of a Black Man @ImNotJayson]

Do you remember when you joined X? I do! #MyXAnniversary

[Mind of a Black Man @ImNotJayson]

Do you remember when you joined X? I do! #MyXAnniversary

[Mind of a Black Man @ImNotJayson]

Do you remember when you joined X? I do! #MyXAnniversary

[bananafanafofisa @lisaxy424]

My mom told me to tell you to stop encouraging my behavior.

[bananafanafofisa @lisaxy424]

You may remember this outfit from such days as yesterday.

[Mind of a Black Man @ImNotJayson]

I just had a long conversation with my ex wife and the only thing I can remember about the conversation is why I'm glad she's my ex wife

[Mind of a Black Man @ImNotJayson]

I think I'm going to ask my girlfriend to marry me.

R.I.P. to all my hopes and dreams.

[Mind of a Black Man @ImNotJayson]

15 mental health doctors started following me. I don't know if they think I'm funny or because I'm crazy.

[Mind of a Black Man @ImNotJayson]

Me: I need a woman to be my Bonnie to my Clyde
Girlfriend: Didn't they get gun down by the police
Me:
Girlfriend:
Me: hmm not a good example

[Holistic Revival @SexySpainNights]

Me - Wow, the sun is so hot.

Sun - I have a boyfriend

[Holistic Revival @SexySpainNights]

Forgot my cell phone today

Now what I'm I going to do all day at work?

[Holistic Revival @SexySpainNights]

I always feel bent out of shape in a yoga class.

[Holistic Revival @SexySpainNights]

Me -
You see my friend, catch a fish and you eat for a day. But if...

Security -
Hey, what are you two doing inside the Aquarium?!!

[Holistic Revival @SexySpainNights]

Fool me once, shame on you
Fool me twice, shame on me
Fool me thrice, are you a wizard?
Fool me qaudrice, wtf?
Fool me quince, do it again!!

[Mind of a Black Man @ImNotJayson]

Do you ever just look at someone and think to yourself " I bet they use 1 ply toilet paper"
No? Just me?

[Mind of a Black Man @ImNotJayson]

The only problem with my girlfriend having a key to my place is now I have to remember to delete the history on all my electronics!

[Mind of a Black Man @ImNotJayson]

Me: If life is a gamble, then death is the dealer and the house always wins

Girlfriend: Jayson, have you been in the medicine again?

[Mind of a Black Man @ImNotJayson]

@1MeLrO I think we just got married

[Mind of a Black Man @ImNotJayson]

*wakes up
"Today's going to be a great day!"
*goes back to sleep