In few years,I must advertise my business @ time square NYC...Even if nah 30minutes picture flash.I know it cost millions of dollars but I will get there📌
If you remove my wife from my life this past 72 hours, I fit kpeme.
We have been moving houses and everywhere is so scattered like mad but once I ask “where is my blue boxers with duduke painting”, she will go straight to the point. “Uhmmmn, it should be in the yellow bag beside the bed”. What of my green comb with black tattoo? “It is inside the black box on the shelf”.
Women actually own the home. I feel like an alien. With how scattered and overwhelming my life is, she still has every detail in her head. Obirin 🙌
I have one piece to share.
I hope all these TL conversations do not poison your heart.
I hope you're not training your mindspace to start choosing partners from a place of fear, or lowered likelihood to cheat. Ask Israel Juju.
These are faulty compasses.
Churchgoers cheat. Atheists cheat. Hijab wielders cheat.
Virgins cheat. Adelebos cheat. 20s cheat. 30s cheat. 40s cheat.
I hope the factors that calibrate your values, are not from Twitter thinkpieces but are strengthened offline. Else, you will end up as a box of ruin.
My safest predicators for relationships are:
- brackets,
- reciprocity.
If you're doing well financially, box within potentials like you doing well financially. Don't be a 7fig earning techie & you'll be hunting smallies struggling with 200L carryover in Laspotech.
Mental brackets. Intellectual brackets. Financial brackets. Exposure brackets.
One of my theories as to why, people (read men) scale way below these brackets is because they're scripting scenarios for control. They're hunting "bendable" women. Chief, she won't be naive forever - but I'll expand on this, some other time.
Be big on reciprocity. As you're doing for your partner in the early weeks, if they like you they would be doing as much.
Using the filters of brackets and reciprocity, are safer predicators than fear and paranoia.
I asked one of my married friends (though older) this question after I visited him and his wife in their UK home. We’ve also been friends since 2010. He said the followings.
“Well, we fight, we fight very well, because fighting is inevitable, but in our fight, every single time we’ve had fight, we still remain lovers, we remain kind. Non of our fight no matter how tough surpass our kindness for each other.
The next one is, we consider everyone after both of us as third parties, especially our parents and siblings, we started dating during our remedial program in 2012, and till today, I’ve never discussed her wrong doings with my parent or siblings before, I am sure she never did too, the only person I’ve discussed our matter with was her twins sister, they love each other so much and it’s just one time and that was even before we got married. So literally in our 14yrs of togetherness, we both have never discussed our issue with anyone. And nobody has ever helped us settle fight.
Hmm, next one is sex, you’ll not have it every time, understand this and it’ll help you navigate your sexual life better. I get tired on some days, she get tired on some days too, both of you should understand that you’re human and tiredness is inevitable. And as a man especially, if your wife is not someone that deny you sex, please don’t force sex on her any day she said no, don’t get me wrong o, even if she deny you sex often too, don’t force sex 😂 but what I’m saying is, if she’s someone who tends to your sexual needs, anyday she said she’s not interested out of tiredness, let her be, you can do cuddles, kisses and other foreplay if she want. Because if it get to a point a woman is having sex with you just so you can be pleased or not angry, trust me you’ll lose her in sexual aspect. Don’t be boring in bed too, try sexual activities that is in line with your religion and belief.
Being a parent and being a couple are two different things. Our marriage shakes a lot when we gave birth to Ahmad, my wife forgot me totally, no time for me again, we had to go for counselling before it gets better. So make sure you both understand parenting and its concept before you start giving birth, in fact if there is anytime our marriage had problems, it was when we gave birth to Ahmad because we both are new to parenting.
Another one is no raising of voice and no raising of hands, no matter how mad we are at each other, non of us is raising voice at the other person and non is raising hands to hit the other person. We also don’t use foul words during fights. Also during our fight, we don’t sleep separate rooms, we sleep on same bed, under same duvet in fact. We set this rules specially on our wedding night.
Another thing is, yesterday fight doesn’t stop today’s love. I’m someone who keep malice if we have unfinished fight, but my wife isn’t like that. I remember one day we had fight a serious one, I was at fault, and the following morning, after prayer, she rested on my laps, for few mins I was like who’s doing this one but I can’t even push her away, then she wake up and prepared my favourite food, prepared my lunch box and still continue fighting. She did everything that she’ll do when we are not fighting. The only thing we don’t do during fighting is s*x, every other thing we do it, that it’ll be as though as we are not fighting.
We don’t argue in front of our kids, or anyone else. During last year Eid for example, her mother asked if we’ve ever had a fight because she never see us fight and we never report each other to her before . You can never catch us fighting.
There is nothing like 50/50. We bring our hundred to the table. And there is nothing like someone’s money is their money and someone’s money is family money. Everyone money that comes to the family belong to the family.”
A thread 🧵
When I started working in the bank, my parents lived in Alakuko, so I used to commute from home every day.
I would wake up as early as 3am, leave the house before 5am, and sometimes get home by 12am if there was traffic…
This particular day, one of my colleagues cooked beans… if you’re a banker, you’ll understand that kind of “beans” 😂 the type that everybody in the branch must eat from.
It was a shortage of 500k, so we had to rally around because our BOM insisted the money must be cleared. That kept me very late at work, and I couldn’t travel back to Alakuko that night.
I took a bus to Obalende, my plan was to look for a church to sleep in… one thing my mum always told us is that if we are stranded, we should look for a church for shelter.
I walked around Obalende and luckily, I saw a white garment church (C&S). I entered and greeted them, but the pastor said they had received a message earlier in the week not to accept any stranger into the church.
I left…
Then I saw a small bus outside the church, so I entered and sat there because at that point, I didn’t know what else to do. I was even thinking of getting a hotel when a boy came out… he looked about 23–25. He was the son of the woman from the church. He came outside and told me to sneak in.
He and his mum took me to a room called ile abo and offered me a net and a mat.
That was how I slept there… although I couldn’t sleep till daybreak because I was scared 😔
In the morning, he had already gotten me a new toothbrush. I also got a new dress and changed into it.
We exchanged numbers and became very close. He was like a brother to me…
That same month, when I got my salary, I bought 5 white garment materials for them.
One day, I went to work as usual, and one of my customers mentioned he was looking for a receptionist. I asked for the pay and told him I had a brother who just graduated. He gave me his email address and asked him to send him an email and mention my name.
I couldn’t even wait till after work…
I called him during my break. He prepared his CV and sent it immediately.
He went for the interview a week later and got the job… the pay was 180k for a start
That same customer later relocated to the USA in 2024, but before he left, he referred him for an accountant role in one of the big companies on the island. He said my brother was a great guy and he could vouch for him.
Today, he’s doing so well for himself, taking care of his family… they no longer live in church anymore 🥹
When I was travelling, he sent me 300k as his own support. There’s no week we don’t FaceTime…
We spoke last night when he asked if he should relocate to Germany or the UK for his master’s… he got admission in both countries. I know he’s going to do great things.
Anyways, that call was the reason I remembered this story… and I thought to share ❤️
You really never know how far a small act of kindness can go ❤️
As a sexually active man, please pity your partners. 🙏
When you use public toilets, rinse your penis.
Before you sit, lace with toilet papers.
Use one boxer per day.
Your penis care is also important to maintain her vagina's PH. You're the one causing the fishy smell.
Nobody’s car document is expiring soon?
Let’s help you renew without any stress .
Nobody just got a car and wants to register ?
Nobody’s bus document is expiring soon?
I had a misunderstanding with my wife a few minutes before bedtime ,She left our bed to sleep in the living room, I also left the bed and joined her there. I even wrapped my hands around her..
This marriage must succeed by fire by force .. My enemies cannot mock me...
Girl - Girl.. If you like,go settle for a man wey dey keep malice....
Your eyes go clear!!
My wife was watching me play COD the other day and after a while she couldn’t keep it in anymore. She said “why do you like kìllinğ people from behind? Don’t you have honor? Face them like a man nau”
Lmao when e reach your turn, write letter to the enemy that you’re coming to shoot them 😂