Introverted Stoner

Fx Trader💹📉|Hustler|♓|Secure the Bag💼|Benz Addict|#HalaMadrid⚽|F1🚘|As the name implies, #Stoner🍀🌴🌱| Good vibes only🌊|Music is BAE🎵🎧

[ᜰ @socetyhatesjay]

before sex
boy: texts girl
girl: replies five hours later

after sex
girl: texts boy
boy: replies next week

[30 @hoodii30]

Nigga better buy her a ring, a woman who will stick by you through an L is damn near impossible to find. Especially in 2026

[Dr KALU, OON @DrKalu_]

Once you're kidnapped and you have access to your phone, don't panic. Don't call the police.
Go to twitter, insult the President, the and the Chief of Army Staff. Make sure you write their full names in the insult. Within 3 to 6 hours the Army and the police will locate you.

[Mr. Czar @Mrczar_]

Today I learnt that If a wealthy man’s son commits a crime in Nigeria and gets sentenced to prison, they’ll raid poor neighborhoods, pick up an innocent boy, and swap him in.

The rich kid goes home & the poor kid serves the sentence. This is why most of those raids happen.

[Rene🧚🫧 @sheisafairyyy]

I just remembered how excited I was to stop using pencils and start writing with a pen in Primary 3. Funny how the smallest things felt like major milestones back then.

If only I knew 😭

[KAHALA @KAHALA123Y]

Dating a woman who gets excited like a kid every time she’s around you is one of the best decisions a man can make. She’ll treat you better.

[Muna @Munalozy]

Cerave is cancerous ke. Omo! See lawsuits everywhere. Sometimes this poverty dey save me o. Once I buy pears baby oil, I don lock up. 😭

[𝑝𝑢𝑟𝑒 @purelivn]

Lake Como, Italy

[ol’ stocky ⛳️ @oldstocky]

I can understand why Italians saw this and decided to invent unemployment

[Isabella @IsabellaAmara1]

I’ll never understand how someone pays over 16 million for a shop in Lekki, Admiralty
And chooses to sell only chocolates and sweets🤦‍♀️

[͏ ‏ً @Motee_1]

$450k confirmed, i go first convert am to naira, enter bank find one beautiful customer service lady, i go tell her make she check my balance, she go repeat am like 5 times, i go just smile and wink before i comot

[Zidyep Osborn @ZidyepO]

So some of you men send money to your talking stage 😒
Y’all never cease to amaze me.
Thats how you end up in a loveless and transactional relationship.
The only thing you owe each other in a talking stage is a reply.

[zαуууηη_нαѕѕ_αη_ιѕѕυє 💜 @ZayynHassan]

If y'all have to point to Qatar, Bahrain, Kuwait or Dubai everytime you want to sell people on Sharia, instead of pointing to the Northern region OF YOUR OWN COUNTRY that has lived under it for DECADES, then I believe you know exactly what you're doing and you think we're stupid.

[Y.O. @yojora]

Not only is he a sympathizer, he encourages them and he’s a very dangerous person that should be locked up.

[F1 TROLL @f1trollofficial]

Monaco podium

[Ugbede @ugbede_ugbede]

Wicked people always have that particular look, you can't unsee it when my you see it.

[Today Years Old @todayyearsold]

Hollywood has spent nearly $600 million trying to bring Matt Damon home.

Have they considered maybe he just doesn’t want to come back?

[Afghan Zoroastrian @AfgZoroastrian]

Japan and Germany were devastated during WW2.

Their children didn’t become terrorists.

Stop making excuses for your terrorists.

[Ewgi @Ssaasquatch]

Morning devotions in Nigerian households were the original breeding ground for indirect jabs.

Your mum will be praying for you in presence of everyone and randomly say, “Father remove every spirit of laziness, stubbornness and wasted potential from his life,” and suddenly you’re wondering when you offended her.

[MrBanks💰 @Mrbankstips]

Monaco no really go far sha for those wey dey dig am too much (for those wey guide o before Una come for me again)

🇲🇨 Monaco vs 🇦🇪 Dubai for the rich:

For Monaco: Freeze €500K+ in a bank (your money, but locked) and you get to live there 90+ days/yr. No income tax so that’s a plus.

Dubai: Buy AED 2M (about $550k) property (you get an appreciating asset you put up for rent and recoup your investment), get 10yr Golden Visa. You OWN an appreciating asset, ZERO days required to stay. No income tax, huge upside.

Cost of living comfortably a month is basically same or very similar, $5k - $10k a month and you can live in comfort.

Monaco makes you prove you’re rich.
Dubai lets you build richer.

I choose the UAE 🇦🇪 ✅