Shoutout to Consumers for making me think the world was ending, but actually they were just telling me to turn my heat down. That’s a top notch dad joke by them.
Is wrapping a white elephant gift in happy birthday wrapping paper and then writing “Jesus” in marker under each happy birthday, for a work holiday party a good idea or bad idea? Asking for a friend....
Me: *walking into work this morning*
My brain:
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Don't say it
Me: @ChicagoBears are going to the Super Bowl!!
It’s 2018, almost 2019 even, and we still can’t schedule text messages to send at a specific time. I don’t want to have to stay up till 11pm to heckle everyone who still has to go to work tomorrow because they didn’t win the lotto.
@TheFareBear Honestly no idea, heard about the bridge collapse and then we found out from the computer on the coach bus that at the time of the collapse we were only a mile past it at the time of the collapse
Drove over the bridge in Italy 2 minutes before it collapsed. Solid reminder to be thankful for what you have and tell the people around you love them because you never know when it will be your last.
The most useless thing in life has to be seatbelts on airplanes. I’m sorry, but if this bird is going down, we are all going down and this piece of fabric is not going to save us.
A handful of stories have people painting this NFL Offseason
in a disturbing light.
I want to show love to some players/coaches that have held it down this summer.
A Thread.
Local DC TV interview w TJ Oshie, talking about how he finally got his dad, battling Alzheimer’s disease, out to the game tonight for the first time all playoffs. Oshie 😭, reporter 😭. Sports often produce awesome moments outside of the games themselves. This is one of them.