Brett Morton

[Brett Morton @JBrettMorton]

@downunderguy2 @ScottLantz9 @NPRinskeep 4,500

[Dr. B @BlakeTheRxGuy]

If you’re a NASCAR under the age of 47, you’ll be watching your first ever Cup race today without a Busch or an Earnhardt in it.

The 2026 Coca-Cola 600 will be the first NASCAR Cup Series race without an Earnhardt or Busch in the field since 1979.

[Luke Thomas Gets Political (LTGP) @LTGetsPolitical]

I’m not conspiracy oriented by nature, but WTF is this?

[ACD MMA @acdmma_]

i was deadass joking and the mf actually did it LOL 😭

[Brett Morton @JBrettMorton]

@KunathMMA Karo Parisyan

[Patrick Daugherty @RotoPat]

Krusty The Clown: And as we stand here to dedicate this *looks at cue card* uhh, not golden calf

[Brett Morton @JBrettMorton]

@FrontRowBrian Poor work is poor work. Just crank out more garbage for the masses.

[Brett Morton @JBrettMorton]

@Titans @ilikecheesedogs Those are awesome. Going to need both!

[Tennessee Titans @Titans]

RT and comment for a chance to win this Carnell Tate & Keldric Faulk autographed can cooler! 👇

[Brett Morton @JBrettMorton]

@SteveSkojec Can’t find who did it when they are looking for themselves, right?!

[𝗫𝗮𝘃𝗲 🇦🇺 @WonderbreadMMA]

All fighters from the legacy promotion WEC are officially retired

End of an Era.

[Brett Morton @JBrettMorton]

@HeyHeyItsConrad @HeyHeyItsConrad you probably won’t like what is sitting in mine when I take the top off. But they have been in there for a long time.

[Correcting the Record with Guillotines ☭ @SetPixels]

@factpostnews @VazquezSonne4 Said within a day of each other. We live in the stupidest of times.

[Aakash Gupta @aakashgupta]

NASA pays $100M for Microsoft 365 licensing across the agency. They standardized every system on Microsoft. They put Microsoft Surfaces on the Orion spacecraft as the crew's personal computing devices.

And the first technical crisis of humanity's return to the Moon was Reid Wiseman radioing Houston to say he has two Microsoft Outlooks and neither one works.

Mission Control's response? "With your go, we can remote in and take a look." The same exact workflow your company's IT helpdesk uses when you submit a ticket on a Monday morning. Except the user is traveling at 4,275 mph, 30,000 miles from Earth, and the Wi-Fi situation is considerably worse.

This spacecraft survived hydrogen leaks, helium leaks, a faulty heat shield, and a broken toilet. Outlook broke anyway. The toilet actually got fixed faster.

The real story here is that Microsoft has achieved something no other software company in history can claim: a support ticket from lunar transit. Their enterprise sales team should frame this. "Battle-tested in space" is a positioning statement most B2B companies would mass murder for, and Microsoft accidentally earned it because Outlook crashes everywhere, including orbit.

Outlook remains the only software in human history that performs identically whether you're in a cubicle in Redmond or aboard a spacecraft bound for the Moon. Universally, reliably broken. And we keep buying it anyway.

[Brett Morton @JBrettMorton]

@JESnowden Hang in there!!

[William Shatner @WilliamShatner]

At 95, I'm still smokin'! 😝

I’ve learned two things:

Never waste a good cigar.
Never trust anyone who says you should ‘act your age.’ 😉👍🏻

[Brett Morton @JBrettMorton]

@TheEmilJay Check out @ONLYATGRANDSLAM https://t.co/XAah7I1CU1

[Brett Morton @JBrettMorton]

@GIFsZP If marketed properly will make them millions of dollars in merch sales.