Jaclyn 💙

[Midwest vs. The Rest @midwestern_ope]

Midwesterners watching the storm roll in

[samantha reid @sammmreid]

really missing the fro yo boom of the early 2010s. I am tired of coffee meetings and happy hours. let me put a cup of gummy bears on top of my fake ice cream while we catch up.

[jon drake @DrakeGatsby]

Is maple the only kind of tree that has delicious blood or are we missing out on other ones

[Jamaal Williams @jswaggdaddy]

🤣🤣💙

[Pride of Detroit @PrideOfDetroit]

Can't believe we're just a year away from the Lions in the Super Bowl.

[#1 samir @samir]

tom brady retiring so he can visit every stop on the beyonce tour

[Trevor Noah @Trevornoah]

Amazing how you can subscribe to any service instantly & they take your $ with one click but when you try to cancel, suddenly you need to call their helpline which is always too busy and so you have to find a dragon to fly you to Mordor to slay your subscription in the flesh. ⚔️

[Major's Mess Hall Podcast @majorsmesshall]

My aunt had stage fright so I gave her a gummy.... lord help

[Dan Regan @DanRegan_Comedy]

New Year's Eve would be so much better if it happened around sevenish.

[Simon Holland @simoncholland]

I’m sure sleeping in is nice but being the only one awake in a quiet house drinking coffee by the Christmas tree is elite.

[jon drake @DrakeGatsby]

“I’m hungover”
- Lame
- Big deal
- Get off the couch

“The gods have punished me for my indulgences”
- Oh damn
- That sounds serious
- Shall I prepare a healing poultice?

[Meg St-Esprit @MegStEsprit]

Those without babies any longer, remember the vague haze of terribleness where we just groggily would say “Maybe it’s teething?” for months on end because we aren’t allowed to say “Maybe my baby’s just an asshole.”

[Cincinnati Zoo @CincinnatiZoo]

Fritz has been working hard on doing a barrel roll that his family is famous for. He hasn't done a full roll yet, but he's getting close!

[Luke Mones @LukeMones]

I love when your phone gets old and it just starts acting haunted

[Detroit Lions @Lions]

The yeehaw agenda 🤠

[Today Years Old @todayyearsold]

I just discovered that baby owls sleep on their stomachs cause their heads are too heavy and I can’t stop laughing

[chase @_chase_____]

“gummy vitamins are useless” oh i didn’t realize having a regularly scheduled scrumptious little morsel was “useless” but ok