Jason Applebaum

[Jason Applebaum @Jason______A]

@IstvanicMarin Never pass it back … never

[Jason Applebaum @Jason______A]

@tannerplanes Don’t blame
Me blame the group

[Jason Applebaum @Jason______A]

@Ecomforfun @WestsideLAGuy If she has highlight reels she’s been fuckkkkkin

[Jason Applebaum @Jason______A]

@ButkusD_ @jordanmenard Send agenda and SOP plz?!?!

[Jason Applebaum @Jason______A]

Ive officially reached the point in adulthood where Im willing to pay someone to deal with adulthood for me.

Day 1 of having an assistant.

After months of @jordanmenard practically begging me to just try having one I finally gave in.

First order of business was handing her a list of about 900 home related things Ive been putting off because apparently as an adult, your expected to spend half your life calling plumbers, electricians, contractors, and every other service provider imaginable.

Now Im sitting here wondering what else I can delegate.

I feel like I have unlocked a cheat code but have absolutely no idea how to use it.

For those of you who have assistants what are you actually having them do?

How do I speed this process up?

Im not looking to delegate a few emails and calendar invites.

I want to outsource literally every single adult responsibility that doesn't require my physical presence.

If I never have to make another phone call, schedule another appointment, chase another person down, or deal with another minor inconvenience for the rest of my life, I will consider this the greatest investment Ive ever made.

Please tell me what I'm missing.

I want to become aggressively more useless at being an adult.

[Jason Applebaum @Jason______A]

@RyanClogg @jordanmenard Gotta spell St Barths correctly but ya your likely correct 😂 just come with Dude

[Jason Applebaum @Jason______A]

@RyanClogg @jordanmenard Where do you think we will be?

[Jason Applebaum @Jason______A]

@Maxwell_Maher @jordanmenard Ya I’m sure that happens with time which is fantastic to think about

[Jason Applebaum @Jason______A]

@matuniox @jordanmenard Like what?

[Jason Applebaum @Jason______A]

@buffalofink @jordanmenard They aren’t local

[Jason Applebaum @Jason______A]

@seanheilweil @jordanmenard I know this but it doesn’t help lol

[Jason Applebaum @Jason______A]

@LORDSKAPE @jordanmenard She is not local (not even in the US) but my buddy Adam has a local chef he uses that is A+ and I’ll prob add that into the rotation.

[Jason Applebaum @Jason______A]

@runtraffic I buy mine Rolexes

[Jason Applebaum @Jason______A]

@drspgn @fedsoldatthetop Never will I ever do one of these at my house again

[Jason Applebaum @Jason______A]

The short propaganda online is insane so let me help you short kings that have to look at this shit all day.

I’m 5’8 I never had a single problem pulling an endless supply of women.

Before I was rich, no problem

Before I was physically fit, no problem

Shit I used to pull girls when I was fat and poor at the same time.

If you can make a woman laugh, you can make her take her clothes off.

I never did online dating so maybe I’m just a boomer who doesn’t know shit on that side of the world but I can walk up to any woman at any time and close.

[Murray Hill Guy @MurrayHillGuy1]

Ran possibly my most brutal dating app experiment yet:

Normal 5’9 guy vs. an extremely unattractive woman.

Results were here all tracked…

Guy: 12 likes, 3 matches, 0 date offers.

Woman: 1,206 likes, 342 matches, 28 date offers.

100x more likes. 114x more matches.

I knew it would be bad.

I did not think it would be THIS bad.

It’s cooked

[Jason Applebaum @Jason______A]

@maxwellfinn Hahha facts

[Jason Applebaum @Jason______A]

@scalesurfer_ @zachmstuck Am I wrong?

[Jason Applebaum @Jason______A]

@fedsoldatthetop @drspgn I had a giant house on lots of land and when I moved in I had a 3 day rager. Had limos being people two and from on rotation. Actually destroyed parts of the house and made my neighbors hate me… it was a very bad idea.

[Jason Applebaum @Jason______A]

@blaketiggy About 14 years ago when I lived in the comfort suites and was learning internet marketing and sat at a desk 24 hours a day eating snacks and drinking redbull vodka

[Jason Applebaum @Jason______A]

@drspgn I sad fat and broke .. when I had the Appalooza house I had a lot of $ but ya closed heavy at that 3 day party 😂