Jen

previously on desperate housewives

[Jen @Jeniscool4]

This woman just checked into the gym and asked if she could borrow some scissors then CUT TWO HOSPITAL BANDS OFF HER ARM and just walked in. Excuse me WHAT

[Jen @Jeniscool4]

I need to clean my chest wound before bed, but that’s so much energy

[Jen @Jeniscool4]

@buscemifilm Please where is this from, I’ve been looking everywhere :(

[Jen @Jeniscool4]

I went to dinner with my parents and when I told the waitress I was in accounting she thought I meant porn, then realized I meant ACTUAL accounting. And I had to explain it to my parents at Texas Roadhouse.

[Jen @Jeniscool4]

I’m trying to “no days off” it at the gym, but I’m so, so sleepy.

[Jen @Jeniscool4]

Watching Hostel 2 is making me really want to visit Europe more. Like minus the kidnapping and murder, it looks fun.

[Adam @adamgreattweet]

same, escalator handrail, same

[Cincinnati Zoo @CincinnatiZoo]

Fritz with a mouthful! 😂 He's up to 766 pounds!