Jesse White (fake)

This is fake. Secretary of State of Illinois, NOT a secretary for Illinois, MOM! Duties include tumbling, organ harvesting, keepin' it real.

[Jesse White (fake) @JesseWhiteIL]

You may or may not cry while eating your paper ID. Though I may not like, I have no control over that specific issue. #IllinoisLawIsILL

[Jesse White (fake) @JesseWhiteIL]

Remember, when getting a new ID, you will first receive a paper copy at the DMV. That copy will be valid until the plastic ID arrives in the mail. Also remember, you MUST eat the paper copy immediately after receiving the plastic copy. I like mine with a little garlic salt!

[Jesse White (fake) @JesseWhiteIL]

@quinmyers @johnnydizz @davelauer It means you're cool, sacks are cool, respect your mom, stay in school! #poetandIknowit

[Jesse White (fake) @JesseWhiteIL]

@quinmyers I don't think you need the "no one:" part of this joke because you establish that, in fact, someone does say something other than nothing!
Still it was a fun read! I love you!

[Jesse White (fake) @JesseWhiteIL]

@quinmyers https://t.co/DnhjBnDSGn

[Jesse White (fake) @JesseWhiteIL]

@quinmyers What time is it?

[Jesse White (fake) @JesseWhiteIL]

@quinmyers I'm revoking your drivers license.

[Jesse White (fake) @JesseWhiteIL]

@quinmyers That's only for baseball pitchers to say to teammates during a mound visit!

[Jesse White (fake) @JesseWhiteIL]

@livstanger Yeah, that's why I stopped going to that weird deli counter that requires a license to buy ham. Much easier to just go to Jewel and take a photo with your ham when you're at home later.

[Jesse White (fake) @JesseWhiteIL]

Life is like my homemade McRib™ sandwich: hard to make, messy, satisfying, onion bun

[Jesse White (fake) @JesseWhiteIL]

More importantly, it will mean that they have also found my '94 Altima which I misplaced 4 yrs ago in the parking lot of a Payless Shoes.

[Jesse White (fake) @JesseWhiteIL]

And by answering this way, it is my hope some1 will respond that they have in fact found my lost CD "Songs to Tumble To" and I will be happy

[Jesse White (fake) @JesseWhiteIL]

But I lost my "Songs to Tumble To" mix CD 5 years ago under the seat of my car [1994 Nissan Altima]...

[Jesse White (fake) @JesseWhiteIL]

I guess an easier way to answer this question would be to say "My favorite music is 'This is How We Do It' by Montell Jordan.

[Jesse White (fake) @JesseWhiteIL]

It is 19 straight tracks of "This Is How We Do It" by Montell Jordan.

[Jesse White (fake) @JesseWhiteIL]

People often ask me, what my favorite music is? The answer: anything off "Songs to Tumble To" which is a mix CD I made 7 years ago.

[Jesse White (fake) @JesseWhiteIL]

bring back nerds blizzards please @DairyQueen! Also @twitter please make this go viral! Thanks to both!

[Jesse White (fake) @JesseWhiteIL]

@Alyssa_Ali cool picks, sudberry's friend!

[Jesse White (fake) @JesseWhiteIL]

@HowardSudberry nice picks sudberry!

[Jesse White (fake) @JesseWhiteIL]

You expect me to go on a cruise by myself?? Gotta find that plus one somehow, baby! #IslandLiving https://t.co/eQVvAB1yRW

[Kyle Fletcher 🐀 @kyleluvsew]

Calling the Secretary of State (@jessewhiteIL) and being spammed by Bahama’s Cruises before support. So unprofessional.