Johnny Doughnuts

I am a funny doughnut

[Johnny Doughnuts @JohnnyDoughnuts]

You don't realize how much you would miss No Reason Boners until after they stop happening so often... Yes I have a NRB right now...! #NRB

[Johnny Doughnuts @JohnnyDoughnuts]

I just saw a co-worker shit himself..... on a related note I also saw the fastest waddle of all time today too! #TodayWasAGoodDay

[Johnny Doughnuts @JohnnyDoughnuts]

I just love it when I wipe with cheap tp and it tears and some sticks to my doughnuthole... #nastyshit #IFeelViolated

[Johnny Doughnuts @JohnnyDoughnuts]

Coffee is like a hot tub for doughnuts. Except doughnuts would ussually get eaten after getting out of their hot tub. #DieHappy #DieTasty

[Johnny Doughnuts @JohnnyDoughnuts]

She be trippin like "Yo, you should surprise me by buying me flowers tomorrow!" And I'm like "But then it's not a surprise..." #Didn'tScore

[Johnny Doughnuts @JohnnyDoughnuts]

Delayed 4 hrs cause train engine got a flat wheel... How does a train get a damn flat!?! #WTF #GotDrunk

[Johnny Doughnuts @JohnnyDoughnuts]

Sunday funday. Time to get rowdy. #RealRowdy

[Johnny Doughnuts @JohnnyDoughnuts]

And she just smelled his butt to see if he made nasty-jelly. #AntiHardOn

[Johnny Doughnuts @JohnnyDoughnuts]

So I'm sitting here in the airport watching a munchkin feel up his mom. I've never been so jealous of a toddler. #foreplay #ForShame

[Johnny Doughnuts @JohnnyDoughnuts]

The Big Doughnut is back baby! #IAmAwesome

[Johnny Doughnuts @JohnnyDoughnuts]

Doughnuts don't let other doughnuts watch Game of Thrones without warning them that it will torture their very souls!

[Johnny Doughnuts @JohnnyDoughnuts]

I just escaped from captivity in the pantry. 6 days of interigation by some "nuts" and they had the wrong guy all along!!! #NotOkay

[Johnny Doughnuts @JohnnyDoughnuts]

I was just checkin myself out in the mirror annnnnndddd may have gotten hard. #DoughyBoner

[Johnny Doughnuts @JohnnyDoughnuts]

Nothing like coffee and doughnuts in the morning!!! #ImAwesome #GoCoffee #helluvaTeam

[Johnny Doughnuts @JohnnyDoughnuts]

Rule #1: no touching of the icing or sprinkles. And that's it!

[Johnny Doughnuts @JohnnyDoughnuts]

Picture this: A beautiful french cruller. That is all. #FoodBoner

[Johnny Doughnuts @JohnnyDoughnuts]

I'm too sexy for my sprinkles. To sexy for my sprinkles. Too Sexy! #DoughnutsAreSexy #StipSlowly #SprinkleStains

[Johnny Doughnuts @JohnnyDoughnuts]

You can definitely lick my frosting! @MilaKunis