Mdala John Kalonga

[𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑺𝒂𝒍𝒕 𝑶𝒇 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑬𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒉 @Shadaya_Knight]

Said it a time ago that even if everyone else doesn't back up Infantino, CAF would back him up. Because it's in African DNA to support corrupt leadership.

[Mdala John Kalonga @JonKalonga]

@flellah And they have been failing to enact the new Public Health Act. We used the ancient one of 1948. Can you imagine that?

[𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑺𝒂𝒍𝒕 𝑶𝒇 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑬𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒉 @Shadaya_Knight]

How about just getting a job?

[Mdala John Kalonga @JonKalonga]

This is criminal pricing mechanism @AirtelMalawiPlc
If you're a moderate user, 450 mins won't be enough but u also can't finish e 2.2k mins so u don't wanna spend the 15k for all those mins. So u stuck with 450 mins @ a cost half the 2.2k mins, and yet may not be enafu anyways

[Nanga_Ndiziphe @itzCathie11]

Eh😂🙌

[مريم ثالث @Maryaamerhhh]

So nobody can come up with counterfeit cars? I really don’t mind driving a Lambogigi Urusco or a Ranger Rovovo I should just be able to afford it😭

[GuayGuay @ChilembaTonk]

@LennieGuay Really had a great time 🥳

[Mdala John Kalonga @JonKalonga]

Koma a Malawi tokha tokha kumatchajana m'ma dollars. Are you importing the lecturers?

[MUBAS @mubasmw]

MUBAS is pleased to announce the names of successful candidates who applied for the respective postgraduate programmes.

Selection list: https://t.co/bjR8m4XUJR

#PostgradStudies #MUBASHUWA
#TheHomeOfInnovation
#Innovate #Create #Generate

[Mdala John Kalonga @JonKalonga]

@Freshswagg90 Heard they are given free slots for their kids or something like.

[Mdala John Kalonga @JonKalonga]

@flellah @akashitigu I mean what's the point of being born just to die?

[Mdala John Kalonga @JonKalonga]

Aged like fine a wine

[Gary Lineker @GaryLineker]

Have this weird feeling that Gianni Infantino will pull off his mask to reveal Sepp Blatter.

[Gary Lineker @GaryLineker]

Have this weird feeling that Gianni Infantino will pull off his mask to reveal Sepp Blatter.

[Ayimbi Vol.1 @AudioRockSwisha]

@tiidrotafrikka2 A simple minded people with no inclination for complex thought. We will continue to suffer. 🤝🏽

[Mdala John Kalonga @JonKalonga]

At least they give me back the WiFi port

[David Leavitt 🎲🎮🧙‍♂️🌈 @DavidLeavitt]

Look what they took away from us 😞

[Mdala John Kalonga @JonKalonga]

@Santaah92 Have heard about it as well. I hear the matter has been in court since

[Mdala John Kalonga @JonKalonga]

@mels896 @FaithEmmanuelah Recall they sent me a letter.

[Mdala John Kalonga @JonKalonga]

@MakwinjaV @JeromeChisikwa Isn't that reactive? And is that therefore competency?

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstein]

🚨 EXCLUSIVE: Chelsea reach verbal agreement with Aston Villa to sign Morgan Rogers⁠. Bid of £117m accepted by #AVFC & being finalised. 6+1y contract, medical Monday⁠. #AFC interested but 23yo attacker wanted #CFC; Xabi Alonso instrumental @TheAthleticFC https://t.co/81YbZw7ELc

[Pemphero W Mphande @PempheroMphande]

On Fridays, he would always call and ask, "Lero mukumwera kuti?" Sometimes we would end up together, sometimes we would not. On one such Friday, we did. He arrived with what was, at the time, perhaps one of the most beautiful girls I had ever seen in Blantyre. Our usual meeting spot was Kaya Lounge. We were both in our early twenties. He pulled me aside and whispered, "Gyan, chinacho chili chokha nde mungathe kumvana nacho." I was excited. I immediately started buying her Hunters Gold, while he did the same for the girl he had come with. The understanding was simple: we would split the bill at the end. About two hours into the night, my friend's girl received a phone call. She stepped outside to answer it, came back a few minutes later, and we carried on chatting. Roughly an hour later, she announced that she was leaving because her "cousin" had come to pick her up. Before leaving, she turned to the other girl and asked, "Iweyo usala?" The girl replied, "No, mesa tinabwera limodzi." My friend was furious. I was disappointed too, but I pretended not to care. He started arguing with the girls as they all walked outside, leaving me alone at the table. His phone was still there with me. After more than thirty minutes without any sign of him, I decided to go outside and see what was happening. There was a full-blown commotion in the car park. The so-called cousin had arrived with two men. My friend assumed one of them had come to collect his girl, and he kept shouting, "That is fine, but at least pay the bill first! I cannot get them drunk for you to just come and take them. I know this trick!" The men tried to drive off, but he blocked the car and even took the keys. A crowd quickly gathered and, after hearing his side of the story, most people actually sided with him. The two men, however, refused to pay. In the end, my friend insisted that if the men would not settle the bill, then the girls themselves had to pay for every Hunters Gold they had drunk before leaving. Back then, a bottle was around MK800, which was not a small amount of money. Eventually, the two men drove off, leaving the girls behind. I quietly paid only for my six bottles of Green, left my friend there with the two girls. Later that same night, we bumped into each other again at Blues. To my surprise, he was still with the two girls, and they were all happily dancing together. He smiled at me and said, "Amwene, chimfachi chayamba kukufunsani kale." I ignored him because, by then, I had already concluded that those two girls were trouble. Looking back, I sometimes imagine this is probably how, centuries ago, the strongest men simply took women from one another!

[HOPKINS @Hopemalopa]

Its high time we reduce of cut alcohol intake, tamwapo izi basi, ma case ama kidney failure amongst men in my age gap are starting to scare the day lights out of me