Col. Beauregard

[Roll ‘Bama Roll @rollbamaroll]

You don’t need the Gator shirt to know this man is a Floridian.

[Scott Van Pelt @notthefakeSVP]

I can’t spell restaurant. Ever. Without spellcheck, forget it. I’ll put an e in there. Put the u in the wrong place. Ok...that’s all I had.

[Col. Beauregard @JoshDStokes]

@JLRIII What are the students of @ClintonSchool to do without a #SOTU? I would hate it if they missed out on one of the most stressful parts of the curriculum. #twohourpaper

[Col. Beauregard @JoshDStokes]

@MsMacNCheese That is amateur compared to Midwest Interstate Literal Expressive Song and Dance.

[Henry Bushnell @HenryBushnell]

He drew up practice plans 5 years in advance. Dropped his pants to prove a point. Dubbed a player 'Irrelevant Roy.' Went to the Independence Bowl and said: “We’re never f’ing coming here again."

The story of Nick Saban’s *eventful* Year 1 at Alabama:

https://t.co/00qNKNzNKm

[MUNCHIES @munchies]

Portland's hottest new pizzeria is devoted to smothering all its pizza with ranch https://t.co/J0zFCDuVC0

[Col. Beauregard @JoshDStokes]

@nate_looney 1. Trading Places 2. Coming to America 3-5. Everything else.

[Col. Beauregard @JoshDStokes]

@MsMacNCheese He is that guy.

[Col. Beauregard @JoshDStokes]

@HoundstoothChi Reservation please. 01/01/2018.

[Drunk Nick Saban @DrunkSaban]

IT’S LIT https://t.co/m367pqXHuh

[Col. Beauregard @JoshDStokes]

@SportingChap @celebrityhottub @CryingJordan And to bed I go. I thank you all for your service. @CryingJordan @celebrityhottub #RTR

[Col. Beauregard @JoshDStokes]

@SportingChap @celebrityhottub I am literally waiting on the auburn @CryingJordan meme and then I can go to bed.

[Greg Bluestein @bluestein]

I could get used to this

[Drunk Nick Saban @DrunkSaban]

Rushing the field in October after beating fucking Penn State? Losers.

[Col. Beauregard @JoshDStokes]

@Johnny_Joey @ABenj88 Just checking. Always known you to be UGA but was confused at the beginning of the season. Should be a good one in ATL in December.

[Col. Beauregard @JoshDStokes]

@Johnny_Joey Who do you root for more? UGA or FSU?

[Chaps @UncleChaps]

I wish I lacked social awareness enough to talk on speaker phone in public.

[Col. Beauregard @JoshDStokes]

But what does it mean? #GoCubsGo