Johnny Rodriguez

Stop creepin

[Johnny Rodriguez @Juan_Burgandy]

@havenmattingly this brings me so much happiness lmao

[Johnny Rodriguez @Juan_Burgandy]

The worst part of online shopping for xmas is receiving packages in the mail and the contents aren't actually for you.

[Johnny Rodriguez @Juan_Burgandy]

@2kenzzz @cincoDAVEmayo Still makes me laugh till this day

[Johnny Rodriguez @Juan_Burgandy]

Happy Birthday @Giannis_An34

[Johnny Rodriguez @Juan_Burgandy]

The flip side of that is being an adult means knowing that you should rather spend that money on important things like bills, food or booze

[Johnny Rodriguez @Juan_Burgandy]

You know why being an adult is awesome?

I can go to Wal-Mart right now and buy the biggest most badass nerfgun and no one can tell me shit.

[Johnny Rodriguez @Juan_Burgandy]

Yo @Uber why the hell does my driver have his check engine light on?

[Johnny Rodriguez @Juan_Burgandy]

When you have to call the police and file a missing persons report cause you haven't heard from the haters in a long time 😎😎

[Johnny Rodriguez @Juan_Burgandy]

@havenmattingly 😂😂 https://t.co/fwlQ5xywFC

[Johnny Rodriguez @Juan_Burgandy]

@havenmattingly "I'm one of you guys." *pinches nose* "Honk, honk" 😂😂 had me dying.

[Johnny Rodriguez @Juan_Burgandy]

@tinytravelergal 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

[Johnny Rodriguez @Juan_Burgandy]

@mrskelliJACKED I'm glad someone is actually looking out for me!!

[Johnny Rodriguez @Juan_Burgandy]

Alright she dropped me off I'm cool now

[Johnny Rodriguez @Juan_Burgandy]

She's trying so hard not to cough, this is how she look

[Johnny Rodriguez @Juan_Burgandy]

Nothing against smokers at all, but don't lie to me about it when I can obviously tell you're a smoker

[Johnny Rodriguez @Juan_Burgandy]

She probably thinking "I can't wait to drop this asshole off so I can smoke another cigarette!"

[Johnny Rodriguez @Juan_Burgandy]

And she's coughing up a lung, I know you ain't sick lady

[Johnny Rodriguez @Juan_Burgandy]

I'm now craving a cigarette and I don't even smoke

[Johnny Rodriguez @Juan_Burgandy]

And I know your ass is lying cause it's smells like someone smoke a thousand cigarettes in here without you knowing

[Johnny Rodriguez @Juan_Burgandy]

HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW WHEN SOMEONE SMOKED A CIGARETTE IN YOUR CAR