Ken Haynes

I like to eat and drink things. Didn't go to Gudger College. There are no teams.

[Ken Haynes @Ken_Haynes]

@pourmecoffee Introducing Mr. Dick Van Dyke as Felix Leiter.

[Ken Haynes @Ken_Haynes]

This doesn’t seem quite on the up and up.

[Heather Cherone @HeatherCherone]

BREAKING: Mayor Lori Lightfoot’s reelection campaign sent an email to Chicago Public Schools teachers Wednesday asking them to encourage their students to volunteer to help Lightfoot win a second term as mayor – and earn class credit. @wttw https://t.co/TGNjlIR7Cq

[Ken Haynes @Ken_Haynes]

Whoa https://t.co/28ArorDoIR

[Ken Haynes @Ken_Haynes]

Really glad to hear this encouraging news.

[Ken Haynes @Ken_Haynes]

Turns out obstructionists were calling from INSIDE THE HOUSE!

[Ken Haynes @Ken_Haynes]

…well…yes. Convicted.

[jannat m. @jannatesq]

@petersagal @jaketapper The clip in question for people asking

[Ken Haynes @Ken_Haynes]

One more LSU touchdown and @BoilerFootball is looking at setting two bowl records for most points allowed in a span of four years. This is not a serious football program.

[Ken Haynes @Ken_Haynes]

People won’t stop here. They’ll make bigger boards…with BIGGER nails!

[ABC 7 Chicago @ABC7Chicago]

Chicago police said a man was critically injured after being attacked with a wooden board with a nail sticking out of it in Lakeview Monday morning. https://t.co/FXMaj2a9eZ

[Timothy Burke @bubbaprog]

By request, here is the multicam view of the feed from Times Square, All-22, and ESPN, Georgia, and Ohio State radio calls, as it happened onscreen live:

[Ken Haynes @Ken_Haynes]

That kick couldn’t have missed by more than 30…35 feet, tops.

[Ken Haynes @Ken_Haynes]

It is excruciating to listen to Kirk call this #CFP game. It’s like suffering through Joe Buck slobbering all over a Cardinals Sunday Night Baseball game.

[Tęrräñøvå🇰🇭 @TerranovaNoah]

Still the craziest sports graphic I’ve ever seen

[Ken Haynes @Ken_Haynes]

AHAHAHAHA

[Ken Rosenthal @Ken_Rosenthal]

Mets concerned with Carlos Correa’s physical. Story with @DanHayesMLB: https://t.co/pHleqBg0ho

[Ken Haynes @Ken_Haynes]

Was hoping the Cubs would land him. Bummer.

[Jeff Passan @JeffPassan]

First baseman Josh Bell and the Cleveland Guardians are in agreement on a two-year contract, sources familiar with the deal told ESPN.

[Ken Haynes @Ken_Haynes]

Haha, Indiana football is so bad. It’s like fighting a mailbox. Boiler up!

[Ken Haynes @Ken_Haynes]

🫡

Mastodon: [email protected]

[Ken Haynes @Ken_Haynes]

@BoozyBeggarChi A buzz button would be a fun garnish for this. Last time I had one it felt like my mouth was broken.

[Ken Haynes @Ken_Haynes]

@samrosenberg82 Terrific. Just let me know whenever there *isn’t* an earthquake, to be safe.

[Ken Haynes @Ken_Haynes]

If this site goes down, how will I know when there’s an extremely mild earthquake in California?

[Ken Haynes @Ken_Haynes]

@napientek Oh my God, I didn’t even consider this!