The boys of single mothers get hit twice, for not only are they deprived of a proper male role model to emotionally ground them and guide them through their tumultuous boyhoods, but are likewise expected to become for their mothers the very paternal presence they themselves were denied - to normalise this then is a most egregious cruelty - our boys deserve much better.
It is your duty to be rational, and truthful.
Lies are for boys, and women.
They lie all the time, to avoid being accountable.
Truth, no matter how painful, should be told.
Deep conversation with buddies yesterday:
Mans said we are getting to the age where its becoming clearer who put in the work and who didn't. That it's not just a money thing, but even our in networks. The conversations we are having: what have you done with life? Are we referring to the things we have done, or the things we could have?
He knotted his fist, said, in fact, not achieving the dream is not the biggest issue. It's never having tried. Said he is no longer even concerned with being the biggest artist in Africa anymore, but when his son asks: "what did you do?", he wants to be able to point him to the evidence of his attempts:
That I did one, two, three, and there they are. That's more important than the dream. The things you actually do, not the aspirations.
I said, brother, you know there are disadvantages in life, like not having enough resources? Poor people work hard. They are just unlucky.
Dude, almost lost it. Said, first, I don't know who peddled this notion that privileged folks don't work hard but that aside, "Okuna, how many people do you have in your contact?"
I said hundreds.
He said, "if you were dying right now, would you call them to rescue you?"
I said, yes.
He said, have you reached out to any of them for your dreams? And not just to talk about dreams but to actually be a part of it?
I said, well, you know, everyone has something they are dealing with. I wouldn't want to impose.
He said, exactly! You don't want it bad enough, my brother. You are not dying to get your dreams. You still care about perceptions. And that's the problem, we build networks based on perceived and anticipated values we will never have if we don't ask now.
I said, Brother, it's not that people don't ask They ask and alll they get is a no.
Man banged his fist on the table, said, "Good! Delete number! Next!"
I said, Brother, you can't just discard folks because they refused to give you the value you wanted. They have other values.
He asked, what value?
I said, "Conversations. Sex. Future opportunities."
He said, "Okuna, you are dying. Having a dream, potential... is dying. A little everyday. The lights are going off, my man, and you still want to have sex, Okuna? What good are evening conversations when you're drowning, man?"
He said, "In fact, I hate to hear the word potential in adults because its definitive proof you didn't try hard enough. You didn't want it bad enough. It's better if we didn't know you had potential!"
He went on: Okuna, do you know how sad it is to see a guy who you know to be excellent, failing at life? Because of the sanctity they assign potential?
He said, In fact, I want you to lose people, man. I wish more men lost people. So you can lose the illusion of safety that keeps you floating. Every man should get to a place where he knows it's just him, his dreams, and his God!
That's when his journey really takes off!
He concluded, and said: "You know, Okuna, it may not be your fault that you don't get to your dreams. But poor, cursed, unlucky; what evidence exists that you actually put your life on the line for the things you say you wanted? The things you say you deserved?"
How can teachers be conned?
Teachers!
These are the professionals who teach our children about morals, discipline, forthrightness, patience and hard work.
In Mathematics, English literature, History, Religion and Social Studies, they teach with figures, passages, and lived stories about being cautious when investing your money.
In these subjects, they emphasise doing due diligence and educating children that you can't earn a windfall overnight.
You must work hard, consistently and patiently to earn legitimate income.
If teachers can be gullibly conned, then what is the purpose of EDUCATION?
Vitamin C won't be absorbed while consuming sugar.
Sugar blocks Vitamin C absorption through a competitive inhibition process.
It is ironic to eat modern fruits and claim you are eating them for vitamin C.
You are simply eating them because they are sweet.
Educated fools.
When ease comes knocking, bar the door. it brings gifts that poison the receiver, soft hands and weak limbs, a head filled with fluff, and a soul that shrivels under any weight. when hardship comes knocking, open wide. it brings the sort of presents you don't appreciate at first, scarred knuckles and a clenched jaw, a back bent under strain, a gaze that looks right through bullshit. these are the gifts that mold you into something formidable
If you simply choose one goal, use all your free time to pursue that, never give up, and visualise success, you will inevitably reach that goal. It's as simple as that, and youβll get there often a lot quicker than you thought.