Lexy Madrid

Welcome:

[Lexy Madrid @LexyMadrid]

You ever accidentally close the show when the headliner hasn’t even gone up yet? Me either.....

[Lexy Madrid @LexyMadrid]

I’m fuckin stoked about the mandatory masks tbh. No that is not me you see, it just looks like me from the eyes up. Byeeee

[Lexy Madrid @LexyMadrid]

@MelBen11 I’m here for it. Go baby, go!

[Mike Birbiglia @birbigs]

All good. I used your religion in my comedy special.

[candi @scandicandi]

The first year I was allowed to have real ass egg nog I had too many real ass noggies and had to take the gifts up at midnight mass trashed in my lil xmas dress and FORGOT TO WEAR PANTIES. Jesus WEPT.

[Lexy Madrid @LexyMadrid]

I can’t stand watching other people open presents. Mother fucker....rip that shit!

[Lexy Madrid @LexyMadrid]

I left my phone in my @Uber and have no way to report it or contact customer service. For the love of god someone help me @Uber_Support

[Lexy Madrid @LexyMadrid]

I wear my AirPods 24/7 so no one talks to me 24/7

[Lexy Madrid @LexyMadrid]

@_Skylar_Joseph_ 😈😈😈

[Lexy Madrid @LexyMadrid]

I said “I killed 9 babies” on stage last night......I don’t recommend it

[Lexy Madrid @LexyMadrid]

Wow this bar has A thousand Wishes body spray in their bathroom watch out #bathandbodytwerk

[Lexy Madrid @LexyMadrid]

MindHunter got me walking to my car with my keys shoved between my knuckles in broad daylight

[Lexy Madrid @LexyMadrid]

Wow. Chapelle has done it again

[Chris D'Elia @chrisdelia]

Spread your light fearlessly lmao just kidding what if I said shit like that

[Shane Bianchi @shane_showbiz]

My new hit single I Hope You Get Shingles You Stupid Whore is not directed against any particular individual. It's more a general statement towards stupid whores everywhere.

[Shane Bianchi @shane_showbiz]

Note to all potential future employer that may find this page: You better not fucking hire me. I will be such a fucking issue. I suck at work and 100% will steal shit. Who's to say I won't just come in one day and kill everybody. I'm crazy and a PR nightmare also.

[Shane Bianchi @shane_showbiz]

Marriage. Yuck! Imagine only peeing on one person for the rest of your life.

[Jason Ritchey @GoJasonR]

Fun ass shows this weekend at heliumcomedyind with these funny mofos @lexymadrid richragains @nateskatecomedy did his thang w/ @realearthquake
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#goodtimes #live #standup #comedy #funny #standupcomedy… https://t.co/72EbPqFvcT

[LET'S COMEDY x LETS FEST @LetsComedyFTW]

We are rocking shows all over the state today as Let’s Fest 3 rolls on in Fort Wayne with Kill Tony and Open Mic Eagle as well as Todd Barry at the White Rabbit Cabaret in Indy. Come celebrate all things funny with us today Indiana! We love you.

[Lexy Madrid @LexyMadrid]

Here we go!
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@letscomedyftw letscomedyindy @letsfestftw #ftwayne #comedy #comedyfestival #letsfest3 #letsfest #ryanniemiller @ Fort Wayne, Indiana https://t.co/JRnKW1qcDq