Melon Mush (Parody) ⚔

Just an '80s kid lost in space. Honored to be Time's Person of the Year 2006.
Elon's jet (N628TS) can be tracked at

[Melon Mush (Parody) ⚔ @MacGyvermectin]

Crypto Gandalf knows the way...

[Massimo @Rainmaker1973]

How a car differential works, 1937

[reason @reason]

Flock allegedly spotted this Colorado woman's truck around the time and location of a package theft.

What ensued was a Kafkaesque scene in which she insisted it wasn't her, while an officer who came to her door said he had indisputable proof—but refused to show her unless she admitted she stole the package.

"It is her, it is 100 percent, it is locked in, there is zero doubt," he tells her.

But police dropped the case after she provided her cellphone tracking data, camera footage from her truck, and video placing her elsewhere at the time of the theft

From wrongful arrests to officers stalking exes, license plate readers keep exposing police failures: https://t.co/FPyx05m1iZ

[Seth Ackerman @SethAckerman]

the idea that a group of people can be declared the rightful owners of a country they've never set foot in, and thus entitled to subjugate its present-day population, simply because some of their ancestors lived there 2,000 years ago, or because their religion was once the temple cult of some local iron age kingdoms, is too ridiculous to entertain with a straight face.

i invite tom friedman to imagine, say, dsa demanding that the state governments be dissolved forthwith and their powers transferred to the appropriate native american tribal councils. that would be infinitely easier to justify than the notion of a jewish right to self-determination in palestine.

personally i happen to think that mutual recognition of such a right would be a perfectly sensible basis for a future peace settlement between jews and palestinians, simply because, as a practical matter, they have to find a way to live together.

but for friedman to demand that midwestern senate candidates or big-city mayors perform what amounts to a ritual land acknowledgment about the indigenous peoples of the ancient kingdom of judea and their modern-day right to sovereignty over their sacred lands, unjustly usurped in AD 70 by the emperor vespasian - that is the summum of extremist lunacy!

https://t.co/5YfndHzZsW

[Team Talarico @TeamTalaricoHQ]

NEW AD: 14 years ago today, Ken Paxton stole someone's $1,000 pen.

Today, Ken Paxton’s pen victim is endorsing James Talarico.

[Josh Barro @jbarro]

Kind of have to admire Ken Paxton’s devotion to being a piece of shit across as many domains as possible

[Lazy IT Guy @lazy_IT_guy]

Our CFO noticed we spend $65K a month on a proprietary cybersecurity platform called Sentinel Protocol.

She scheduled a meeting with me to discuss our enterprise software expenditures.

She wanted to know why our licensing fees had increased by 15% year over year.

I told her Sentinel Protocol is the only thing standing between our corporate data and a highly coordinated North Korean ransomware syndicate.

I explained that it uses a polymorphic encryption manifold to dynamically scrub our inbound packets.

She asked if she could get a Zoom meeting with their customer success team to discuss a volume discount.

I told her I'd set it up immediately.

The problem is that Sentinel Protocol doesn't exist.

It's an LLC I registered in Delaware 4 years ago.

I'm Sentinel Protocol.

My entire cybersecurity platform is just a batch script I wrote in 2018 that restarts our routers every Sunday at 3 AM.

The script took me 14 minutes to write.

I realized very early in my career that executives will never question a line item if you use the word quantum or heuristic.

But now the CFO wanted to speak to the vendor.

I went on Fiverr and hired a struggling voice actor from Chicago for $45.

I told him his character was a high-powered Silicon Valley tech bro who just drank 3 Celsius energy drinks.

I wrote him a 4-page script composed entirely of weaponized IT buzzwords.

He showed up to the Zoom call wearing a Patagonia fleece vest and introduced himself as the VP of Customer Success.

He was absolutely phenomenal.

When the CFO asked about lowering the cost, he scoffed.

He told her that downgrading our service tier would expose our legacy endpoints to asynchronous tunneling attacks.

He leaned into the webcam and asked if she was prepared to explain a catastrophic data breach to the shareholders.

She apologized for questioning the infrastructure.

Before the call ended, my Fiverr actor successfully up-sold her on a $12K biometric redundancy package.

I don't even know what a biometric redundancy package is.

I tipped the actor $100 and told him I'd need him again next quarter.

The CFO sent me an email thanking me for managing such a crucial vendor relationship.

I just used the new budget increase to buy a pontoon boat.

[Keith Edwards @keithedwards]

This has 2 Million views on TikTok

[𝗧𝗶𝗺𝗲𝗹𝗲𝘀𝘀 𝗠𝘂𝘀𝗶𝗰 ✨🎵 @Hoang_HQ]

I’m violently laughing 🤣

[Phil Magness @PhilWMagness]

@DennisShoup1 @CliffordAsness Correct.

Patrick Deneen's position can basically be summarized as this: he hates the fact that humanity broke out of the Malthusian trap, and he wants to return to the before-times because he believes its comparative poverty established the "common good" moral order he desires.

[Dennis Shoup @DennisShoup1]

@PhilWMagness @CliffordAsness I think some of these postliberals hate the market precisely because it makes people more prosperous and they feel that this prosperity corrupts them. Only a sanctified elite should have wealth, everyone else should be molded into virtue through material hardship.

[Elizabeth Kim @lizkimtweets]

It’s a small world in NYC politics as reporters run into Curtis Sliwa in Midtown after mayor’s presser. He’s asked many including what he thinks about the campaign to stop Mamdani from attending the 9/11 ceremony. “Ridiculous,” he said. “He’s the mayor. Stop being sore losers.”

[Melon Mush (Parody) ⚔ @MacGyvermectin]

@BilyarskEnterer @jaketapper @TheLastRefuge2

[Mike Bales 🫡🇺🇸 @MikeBales]

BREAKING NEWS: Dallas Cowboys practice was delayed two hours today after a player found an unknown white powdery substance on the field. Jerry Jones immediately suspended practice and called the police. After analysis, experts confirmed it was the goal line. Practice resumed once officials decided the Cowboys were unlikely to see it again this season.

[Ted Nguyen @FB_FilmAnalysis]

Best tweet I’ve seen today

[Thenewarea51 @thenewarea51]

REACH 18 (C-32A) just landed ahead of AF1 at Mildenhall with ADSB and MODE-S switched off.

🎥RankUpAviation

[Dan Lamothe @DanLamothe]

The Washington Post credited this great plane tracker account with an import detail in our exclusive tonight. Sharing credit where it's due:

[NowThis Impact @nowthisimpact]

An Arkansas state trooper stopped 18-year-old Alisa Hackett for speeding. But instead of simply issuing citations, he threw her to the ground and punched her in the face — even though she was unarmed and crying out for help.

In the trooper’s own use-of-force report, he admits to striking her in the head with a closed fist to “gain compliance,” despite video appearing to show Hackett overwhelmed, terrified, and trying to understand why she was being arrested.

Hackett was charged with refusing to submit to arrest, underage alcohol possession or purchase, speeding, not wearing a seatbelt, improper display of a license plate, and violating restrictions on vehicle lamps.

[Nick Taylor @NickTayNorfolk]

@Osinttechnical Didn't Volvo gift the 3 point seat belt, rather than people die?

[Mrgunsngear @Mrgunsngear]

This just shows everyone what "crimes" police actually care about.

This Flock camera was reportedly cut down on Friday and police immediately responded WITH A FORENSICS TEAM 🤨

For reference, when someone tried to break into my house (video is up on my channel), the police laughed when asked if they were going to look for finger prints or to photograph the would be criminals' foot prints.

Someone tries to break in to an average citizens house and potentially kill them - no forensics team.

Someone cuts down a 3'' pole on the side of the road endangering literally no one - forensics team with every resource tax payer dollars can be used for immediately 🤡

Plan accordingly...

#CityLife #police #crime #PoliceState #4thAmendment #CivilRights #ALPR #cops #stalking #flock #SurveillanceState #asheville #NC #StandingArmy

[Leah Rain ✝️🇺🇸🎸🏝️ @LeahRain77]

Part 2