One minute you have Ron “the Snake” MacLean rambling on about his sister’s kid in Oakville marrying a deli owner who used to be an Olympic-level curler, who makes the best pancakes he’s ever had.
The next minute you have Jennifer Botterill campaigning to make face washes a suspendible offense and crying about violent actions performed in an inherently violent sport in which everyone who plays does so by their own volition.
Finally, no Social Justice Night in Canada would be complete without Kelly Hrudey trying to score some leftist points by going on and on about his or a player’s “mental health”.
HNIC was an institution—something Canadians once considered a highlight of their week. It introduced a lot of Americans to Canadian hockey culture from afar. It had a captive audience during the first intermission, when one of the most entertaining figures in NHL history, Don “Grapes” Cherry, would shoot straight from the hip with amazing and insightful hockey analysis that has not since been matched.
Today, that same program stands as a source of embarrassment for the same fans that once made it the institution it was.
The worst part is that it doesn’t have to be this way. HNIC could be resurrected by simply hiring the correct analysts for their audience—a task so easy that a child could do it.
@SportsnetPR
Will Sasso and Dan Soder are Macho Man Randy Savage, Hulk Hogan, Andre The Giant, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Rodney Dangerfield, and Robert Deniro reading Andy Rooney quotes. 😂😂😂😂
(🎥@ChrisVanVliet)
🚨Remember that one time when a U.S. Army Green Beret blew himself up in front of trump tower in a Tesla?
He warned us about anti-gravitational propulsion systems and how it could start WW3
Most of the deceased/missing scientists worked on anti-gravity propulsion projects.
My guess about the dead scientists is that a major breakthrough in Fusion technology occurred and it would destroy the fossil fuel industry. Significant progress had been made recently, then silence.
DAVE LETTERMAN: Paul, the New York Mets have lost 12 straight now. Yikes.
PAUL SHAFFER: The NL East.
DAVE LETTERMAN: Right now, the hookers in Times Square are offering a Mets special where they just leave you stranded in scoring position.
PAUL SHAFFER: *plays “Centerfield”*
Don Cherry is a great, patriotic Canadian.
I was proud that we were able to award him the Order of Ontario and I’d be thrilled to see him receive the Order of Canada.