MD

[MD @MattDur92]

Shoutout Larry Prentiss

[drew london @LongLiveTheDuke]

new Action Bronson album is good

[Jacob @AndThatsBB]

I miss old lineup construction:
1. Fastest player
2. Bat control guy (he sucks)
3. Best all-around hitter
4. Best power hitter
5. Lumbering power or bust hitter
6. High-OBP guy who leads off now
7. Bad switch hitter
8. Catcher
9. Gold Glove defender (-5 DRS, can't hit)

[MD @MattDur92]

@chibbs_1 @celtics Yessir Chibbs. We’ll never forget the comeback in 02

[Count Dankula @CountDankulaTV]

The Afroman Trial.

-Cops raid Afromans house for bullshit reasons.
-Steal money, break his door, fuck his house up.
-No criminality found whatsoever, no charges at all pressed on Afroman.
-Afroman spends the next 3 years making songs that make fun of all the officers involved by name, even using footage of the raid from his own CCTV cameras.
-Songs had titles like "Randy Walters is a son of a bitch" and "Lick Em Low Lisa" accusing one of the officers of being a lesbian and sleeping with the other officers wives.
-During the raid one officer looked like he was about to eat some lemon pound cake sitting on Afromans counter, Afroman made a whole album calling the officer fat.
-The cops get mad and file a lawsuit for defamation.
-Afroman turns up to court in a whole American flag suit.
-Officers performatively mald and cry while listening to the songs really trying to oversell how badly the songs upset them.
-One officer was suing because Afroman made a whole song about him saying he was fucking the officers wife. When the officer was asked if Afroman was really fucking his wife, he said "I don't know". Nuking his own case and establishing that there is a non-zero chance that Afroman might actually be fucking his wife.
-As his only witness for the trial, Afroman brought a deputies EX FUCKING WIFE.
-The jury ruled completely in favour of Afroman.

This entire thing has been a great win for free speech and absolutely fucking hilarious.

[Cardi B @iamcardib]

STEPPPPPPPPP IN THE NAME OF JESUS DIGGS !!!!! WALKEM DOWN!!!!!!

[MD @MattDur92]

@hanse16488 @MikeReiss The Pats will wallop the Chargers in the first round, fuck face.

[Barstool Sports @barstoolsports]

AUSTIN HOOPER IS A GROWN FUCKING MAN

[MD @MattDur92]

@kaitlikeshockey Kemba says hello

[MD @MattDur92]

@kaitlikeshockey Yoooooooooooooooooooooo

[Jake Yasi @jake_yasi]

Can the Red Sox play someone else tomorrow? This is boring as shit.

[Jared Carrabis @Jared_Carrabis]

*Nextel chirp*

[MD @MattDur92]

@Steve_Perrault He and Hamilton are cornball brothers

[Tyler Milliken @tylermilliken_]

Just the ovation Brayan Bello deserves.

[MD @MattDur92]

@ColeyMick Please focus your hate on David Hamilton

[Tyler Milliken @tylermilliken_]

Chirping Jarren Duran over his suicide attempt? Go fuck yourself.

[Céad Míle Fáilte @ColeyMick]

He really wanted to swing

[Red Sox @RedSox]

JARREN DURAN JUST STOLE HOME!!!!

[MD @MattDur92]

@JoshuaMellin Hopefully Wrigley was giving out inhalers and insulin as a promo tonight

[Steve Perrault @Steve_Perrault]

RAFFY GOT A HIT! THE SEASON HAS OFFICIALLY STARTED!