Mistress Meow

Mostly quotes out of context. Occasional penis references.

[Mistress Meow @MeowWithMe]

“I think the worst thing she ever did was puke in my mouth.”

[Mistress Meow @MeowWithMe]

“How can a human sleep nose to anus?”

[Mistress Meow @MeowWithMe]

“That’s pretty amazing.”
“What, that they use the same hole for everything?”

[Mistress Meow @MeowWithMe]

“I wonder where the word “gherkin” comes from.”
“Gherkany.”

[Mistress Meow @MeowWithMe]

“I hope they kept her skull.”

[Mistress Meow @MeowWithMe]

Performance art.

[Mistress Meow @MeowWithMe]

“Why is my head moistened with yogurt?”

[Mistress Meow @MeowWithMe]

“Bye! I’ll let you know if they end up having a threeway!”

[Mistress Meow @MeowWithMe]

“You’re none of those things, you’re mentally ill.”

[Mistress Meow @MeowWithMe]

“You’re gonna make a chocolate cock with chips???”

[Mistress Meow @MeowWithMe]

“Yeah, and fuck that chick whose husband’s dying!”

[Mistress Meow @MeowWithMe]

“Remember earlier when you were jacking off my big toe?”

[Mistress Meow @MeowWithMe]

“I’m not gonna pee on you, chill out!”

[Mistress Meow @MeowWithMe]

“Don’t motorboat my book, you’re gonna get spit all over it!”

[Mistress Meow @MeowWithMe]

“Your sister said jizz at the wedding.”

[Mistress Meow @MeowWithMe]

“It’s like that double butthole thing we were talking about!”

[Mistress Meow @MeowWithMe]

“I know you’re snacking and having a crisis, but, any thoughts on dinner?”

[Mistress Meow @MeowWithMe]

“I am making a SANDWICH out of your FLESH!”

[Mistress Meow @MeowWithMe]

“Your chin hairs just teabagged my third eye.”