Mike Patalita

Just a squirrel....

[Boosh @whatsupboosh]

Me: how do I do taxes?

School: here’s a recorder

Me: what is a credit score?

School: just put it in your mouth and blow like this

Me: how do I choose the right healthcare plan?

School: HOT. CROSS. BUNS.

[rob delaney @robdelaney]

I am hearing from multiple sources that #Catastrophe season 4 has gone live in the United States of America. I invite you to watch it. https://t.co/TrLuRcKm5G

[Mike Patalita @MikePatalita]

@seagar_cv Bigly smart.

[Mike Patalita @MikePatalita]

@BassAction89 I do not.

[Mike Patalita @MikePatalita]

@TigNotaro

[Dee Snider🇺🇸🎤 @deesnider]

Hey @NFL! Your go-to songs at EVERY game are metal: Enter Sandman, Cum On Feel the Noise, Thunder, Crazy Train, We're Not Gonna Take It, We Are the Champions, Final Countdown, I Wanna Rock, We Will Rock You, Welcome to Jungle. NONE of those bands have EVER played half-time show!

[Mike Patalita @MikePatalita]

@julieklausner Great cause. Great idea.

[Mike Patalita @MikePatalita]

@randycomm Kris showed me this (she still subscribes to JG online). Great article! But I wonder if your spouse agrees with your comment about her view of your collection?

[Mike Patalita @MikePatalita]

We are having a blast this weekend visiting our good friends, the Rizzos. https://t.co/D5E78QJam3

[Mike Patalita @MikePatalita]

#LivePD is the #nflredzone of #Cops.

[Mike Birbiglia @birbigs]

This article could have been one word.

[Mike Patalita @MikePatalita]

@LauraRichcreek How you doin lady?

[Sen. Bernie Sanders @SenSanders]

To the people of Germany and elsewhere in the world: Please don't think that President Trump represents American values, he doesn't.

[The New York Times @nytimes]

The U.S. has contributed more than any other country to the atmospheric carbon dioxide that is scorching the planet https://t.co/FvOz9QGDUj

[Mike Polk Jr. @mikepolkjr]

A very reasonable stance from a man whom I rarely agree with, but credit where credit is due. I'm proud of our Governor today. https://t.co/MqpRCp1UPJ

[Comedian Ben Bailey 🚕 aka Cash Cab Guy @RealBenBailey]

When you hear they might do your show without you. #WTF !?!?
Retweet if you think I should host the new episodes of Cash Cab on @Discovery.

[RiotWomenn @riotwomennn]

Wasn't long ago @KellyannePolls was warning about the danger of the 1000's who lap up Trump's lies. We see you

[Mike Patalita @MikePatalita]

@slinganswers Amazon fire stick and my Samsung phone.