I have a chance to get out of this shelter and into a home!
I've met a man here and we have decided to share an apartment in order to make it affordable.
I'll need help with a down payment.
So I've started this fundraiser.
Please share it. https://t.co/MVGKaPQp03
Once the scapegoat begins to visibly show the psychological toll of the abuse—things like anxiety, depression, emotional shutdown, or even physical symptoms—the narcissist parent goes into damage-control mode. They cannot allow outsiders to connect the dots and see that the child’s condition is the result of abuse.
So, they reframe it. They might:
Pathologize the child: Claim the child has a mental illness, developmental disorder, or personality problem to deflect from their abuse.
Blame external factors: Suggest the child’s struggles are due to bad influences, laziness, school problems, or even the child’s own choices.
Play the devoted parent: Exaggerate how “hard they’re trying” to help, painting themselves as victims of a “difficult child.”
Doctor shop or diagnostic groom: Push professionals toward alternative explanations while hiding the abuse context.
In short, they manipulate the narrative so that what’s really abuse trauma gets mislabeled as something else—anything but the truth.
@lew_jeffrey@coffeecatharine Sign me up!!!!! The Eagles were a formative band for me. And you sound professional playing that banjo, bro! I am very impressed. That is a difficult instrument.
@coffeecatharine I have one more for y'all.
Lou Reed. Perfect day. Another very personal song.
Thanks for allowing me to indulge my love of music and heal the wounds that held me back!
@coffeecatharine You know, your kindness and encouragement has helped me start to overcome my shyness around sharing my musical skills. Most of my life, it was made fun of. And I have never played or sang for any family of origin member. Ever.
So...thanks for being part of my healing🫂
@_imperfectfaith I remember this...not very long ago. I'm so sorry that it's so hard. I know. And although my life is hard right now, I want to offer some hope. It will get better. My life is better now, regardless of current hardship. The weight is lifting! Yours will too. 🫂❤️
@_imperfectfaith I haven't been out here much. I'm overwhelmed trying to survive the same ordeal as you are. And I completely understand this new problem. People think that the Canadian government just gives away food and lodging and money. But the sad reality is, we have to beg and fight for it.
@_imperfectfaith Wow. I have felt this way for a long time now. I'm sorry that I don't have anything to offer that would fix this.
But you are not alone in this struggle.
It's been a while since I have posted here. I'm okay. Ish. Still staying at the mens shelter. Watching rent prices rise as I unsuccessfully search for a place to live.
I'm sure tariffs won't help...
This sucks. But I have to keep going...