Molly Ferguson

[TheFrenchie @ML3democrats]

Donald trump said Kamala Harris would raise gas prices by 25% so thank God you avoided that nightmare. Today gas prices are only up by 62%.

[dr. floww @__Floww]

take me off my SSRI and yall gone wish we were one nation under god.

[m @pumptinis]

everybody who’s starting summer house this week due to the drama is going to shit their pants when they see erika kirk

[Collins🦋 @collinstimbela_]

Make the Microsoft CEO search for an email on Outlook live on camera

[DeeMagicGurl @DeeMagicGurl]

Instead of a CEO eating a hamburger, I’d like to watch the @southwestair CEO find a $39 flight.

[Tim Young @TimRunsHisMouth]

First Venezuela and now Iran…

My gas better be 49 cents a gallon after all this.

[Mxim @sugeezy]

I had a million opportunities to waste money this year and I took them all. In fact, even when there wasn’t an opportunity, I created one.

[Covie @covie_93]

The sad fact is, if Tyler Robinson had used his gun to massacre students at Utah Valley University instead of just fatally shooting Charlie Kirk Republicans wouldn't care this much.

[lauren 🍄 @lolowrenn]

that horrific footage is the same thing that happens to children at school, btw.

[Sophie Hall @SophLouiseHall]

Not to be dramatic but when I accidentally save a file twice and it adds that (1) at the end, it is the worst moment of my life

[chris evans @notcapnamerica]

My mother during a movie:

Who is she?
Do they know each other?
Where did he come from?
Omg is he going to die?
Are they going to get together?
Why is he hiding back there?

OMG IM WATCHING THIS FOR THE FIRST TIME JUST LIKE YOU ARE

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOP

[Average Dad @Average_Dad1]

I might be crazy but I’m not go to Costco on a Saturday afternoon crazy

[limp brittzkit @Brittymigs]

no free healthcare in this country, just a little red monster who asks you if you’re okay on twitter

[🐌 @Wheeema]

when you pass someone to see if they look as stupid as they drive

[trash jones @jzux]

(me on my first day back to work after thanksgiving break)

hey can this wait til after Christmas

[me espresso @zingingcutie22]

i’m laughing so hard

[Taylor Swift @taylorswift13]

Surprise!! 1989 (Taylor’s Version) is on its way to you 🔜! The 1989 album changed my life in countless ways, and it fills me with such excitement to announce that my version of it will be out October 27th. To be perfectly honest, this is my most FAVORITE re-record I’ve ever done because the 5 From The Vault tracks are so insane. I can’t believe they were ever left behind. But not for long! Pre order 1989 (Taylor’s Version) at https://t.co/12bONe9FJA 🩵😎🩵

📷: Beth Garrabrant