BadAss Maverick Mom

I am a BadAss Maverick Mom (or BAMM) who wrote a humorous book for moms who are raising toddlers while going through perimenopause and menopause.

[BadAss Maverick Mom @MomMaverick]

Let's have a baby when I'm 42, so I can go through perimenopause and menopause when she's going through the terrible twos and effin' threes, said nobody ever.

[BadAss Maverick Mom @MomMaverick]

For those you with toddlers, thinking it gets easier, it doesn't, and when they are 17 and struggling, you'd give anything to be able to solve it with 5 gummy bears like back in the day.

[BadAss Maverick Mom @MomMaverick]

@8WithaTiara Right? And just when you are getting out of the "I don't have PMS. My husband turns into a real asshole once a month" stage.

[BadAss Maverick Mom @MomMaverick]

@ThrillaRilla369 Banana wagon wheels (do they still exist?)

[Nayele18 @nayele18maybe]

my hobbies include mozzarella sticks

[Not Today Eric @NotTodayEric]

If I die, delete my search history. Not because of porn or anything I’m just embarrassed about how many times I’ve googled myself.

[Mom Jeans @momjeansplease]

My son learned a new word today, and now he won’t stop calling us all lesbians. Including the dog.

[eli 🕯✨ @nienna121]

Unfortunately I’ve discovered that I actually DO drink more water when I have a nice water bottle with a straw. What am I? A toddler????

[One Awkward Mom @oneawkwardmom]

Me: Your honor, they were smacking their gum.

Judge: Case dismissed.

[e l l a 🇨🇦 @blondehotcoffee]

do you think the washing machine and the dryer are actual friends or just work friends?

[Sweet Momissa @sweetmomissa]

Okay who put this water in my wine glass, reveal yourselves reverse Jesus.

[Jennifer Parker @Mrs_JParker]

5yo: Mommy, there’s hair on your arm.

Me: Yep.

5yo: You’re turning into Dad.

[Late to the party Laura @ericamorecambe]

Does anyone calling another person ever actually want them to answer?

[meghan @deloisivete]

A new house isn’t truly a home until you’ve let a bag of salad die in the fridge

[Lady Lawya @Parkerlawyer]

I don’t know what kind of algorithm I’ve gotten myself into but I know more about lymphatic drainage than I feel is necessary.

[mariana Z @mariana057]

If someone from ziplock could contact Literally anyone in the cereal Business that would be great…

[Simon Holland @simoncholland]

Man these are nice scissors

-me, about to get in trouble for opening a pack of bacon with my wife’s scissors.

[krista @kristabellerina]

I told my husband not to get chips or ice cream or cookies at the store, and go figure, this is the first time he actually listened to me (and now I have to go to the store for chips, ice cream, and cookies).

[BadAss Maverick Mom @MomMaverick]

Some days with kids be like: When I met my husband to be and my biological clock was ticking so loud, we could barely carry on a conversation, we should have just carried on a conversation.

[Simon Holland @simoncholland]

Drank a full pot of coffee before anyone in my family woke up so I am full on tweaking from caffeine while they are rubbing sleep out of their eyes and yawning. 10 out of 10 dad move.

[One Awkward Mom @oneawkwardmom]

It’s once again that time of the week where I ask myself if I need a therapy appointment or just some form of potato.