Mark Dunker

[Alfie | HITC Sevens @HITCSevens]

This is sadly true.

I tried to wave an England flag during the Norway game, and I was shot and killed by Keir Starmer.

[Count Binface @CountBinface]

I am binevitable.

[Lisa Nandy MP @lisanandy]

I've decided to leave this platform and my Department will too.

A platform originally designed for free speech and expression now favours abuse and misinformation over meaningful debate.

It isn't healthy for our democracy or our communities and I don’t want to support it.

[Jonathan Pie @JonathanPieNews]

Yes we need change. We need fewer self-serving career politicians. So that rules you out, you two-faced snake oil selling cunt.

[Larry the Cat @Number10cat]

@raelbrav Cat check: Braverman's wife was Home Secretary who had responsibility for managing legislation relating to police powers in England and Wales

[Anonymous @YourAnonNews]

@WhiteHouse If you have all the cards and you’re playing Uno, you’re losing you fucking moron.

[Kieran Maguire @KieranMaguire]

The FIFA Peace Prize winner speaks…

[Governor Newsom Press Office (parody) @AwesomeNewsom]

DONALD TRUMP IS THE MOST WELL-READ PERSON IN THE ROOM? WHO ELSE IS IN THAT ROOM? TWO ROCKS, A JELLY DONUT, AND LEAVITT?

[Cabinet Office @cabinetofficeuk]

This is the biggest reform to our Parliament in a generation. 🇬🇧

This morning, the 700-year-old system of hereditary membership in the House of Lords was abolished. Membership is now earned through public service and merit, not granted by an inheritance. ✅

[Reform UK Exposed 🇬🇧 @reformexposed]

@SuellaBraverman What she means by ‘last chance’ is Reform UK are the last chance failed Tories like her have at a career.

[Wes Streeting @wesstreeting]

Farage has announced his Shadow Cabinet, with no Health Secretary.

Presumably because if he becomes Prime Minister, there’ll be no NHS.

[Parody Nigel Farage @Parody_PM]

Jim Ratcliffe has my full support. Anyone who lies about population figures, claims £120m in public money for his own company after paying no UK tax at all, while immigrants pay at least £15bn is my kind of guy!

[Ed Davey @EdwardJDavey]

457 British troops lost their lives in Afghanistan.

Trump avoided military service 5 times.

How dare he question their sacrifice. Farage and all the others still fawning over Trump should be ashamed.

[Nigel Farage @Nigel_Farage]

Jenrick is a fraud. I’ve alway thought so, this quote proves it.

[Luke @LukeWhosTalking]

I have no evidence to back this up, but they all have artificial lawns.

[Marina Purkiss @MarinaPurkiss]

Praised Israel’s use of US weapons: “You used them very well.”

Green‑lit strikes on Iran

Sides with Russian aggressor

Threatens military action in Venezuela

Hints at “taking” Greenland

Deploys national guard on own people

…wins FIFA peace prize.

[Politics For You @PoliticoForYou]

BREAKING 🚨🚨🚨

FIFA World Cup draw delayed as Gianni Infantino’s tongue remains lodged in Donald Trump’s arsehole.