Marni Bee

hi

[alexa @alexadoingstuff]

My boyfriend makes my life infinitely more interesting and exciting and in exchange I remind him to drink water

[Bhald Bhaddie @teejslipko]

Post a TV show that you're the only person you think remembers it exists

[WeRateDogs @dog_rates]

This is Ruger. His new friend exploded. Just out of nowhere. You have to believe him. 13/10

[chlo @chlosih]

Someone on TikTok said “Marriage isn’t a goal, it’s a potential outcome as a result of a healthy relationship” & she’s so right. “Dating for marriage” focuses on marriage as a goal (instead of compatibility and pleasure) and that’s what leads to unhappy unsustainable marriages

[RangerDonovan @RangerDonovanTV]

Well I just got to work and today someone took a literal shit at the door...

[WeRateDogs @dog_rates]

This is Silo. He’s working on his entrances. They’re a little aggressive at the moment. Still 14/10

[Tom Zohar @TomZohar]

Not being a Pokémon gay is wild because every once in a while I just see a bunch of you tweet “I would die for him” and it’s a cartoon purple rat named “Skrimple”

[Swarthy Swabian @MuKuDk2]

@jamieloftusHELP I've always been saying that playing the saxophone is a red flag. Definitely the most problematic brass instrument.

[jamie loftus 🌭 @jamieloftusHELP]

i have been dumped by a man with a foghorn leghorn tattoo sleeve because seeing me once a week was getting in the way of his saxophone practice schedule. i can handle disappointment

[WeRateDogs @dog_rates]

This is Lapsha. She’s wondering if these photos make her nose look big. If you could take a peek and get back to her that'd be great. 14/10

[Mike Abrusci @mikeabrusci]

I am happy to let everyone know that according to the PCR test I took 15 days ago and just got the results from, I did not have covid then

[Hot Take Appreciator @IHateNYT]

I love being at my parents' house and getting asked "is this your glass? Can I put this in the dishwasher?" .001 seconds after putting a glass down

[Soren Bowie @Soren_Ltd]

Shout out to all the youngest siblings out there who “believed” in Santa far too long because they knew the minute they stopped it would fundamentally change Christmas in the family forever.

[defne gencler @omgitsdef]

Well, at least we can say the vaccine was a light in the middle of the tunnel

[Rob DenBleyker @RobDenBleyker]

"have you heard about the Nu covid variant"

"no, what's it called?"

"the Nu variant"

"yeah what's it called"

"no, it's literally spelled N U, Nu"

"haha wow, who named it that?"

"yes"