Ryan

[Miles McQuiggan @MilesMcQuiggan]

The NFL's gotta figure out a way to solve for how regularly a ball five yards under-thrown turns into a 30-40 yard penalty on the defense.

It happens multiple times per game and it's not the spirit of the rule.

[star anise @anisenot]

My aggressively vegetable avoidant 3yo would always eat French onion soup because I called it “Brown noodle soup” but a waitress totally biffed the whole thing going on & on about how amazing it is “to see a toddler who likes onions”

Immediately she refused to eat anymore

Thank goodness I am deep into my “it’s ok to lie to the kid phase” because I was able to convince her the waitress was actually referring to “chunyons” which is simply a French word that means “brown noodles”

[Ethan Brooks @alt_w_v_g]

Just let me know which one I should restart

[Ryan @NEPatsFan57]

@Cnyped Two watch retard moving in slow motion with the corniest guns imaginable. I fucking hate people like this.

[Noah 🔶 @st_noah_of_arc]

"But if my child's school bans phones, how do I contact them during the school day" You don't? The same way your own parents couldn't contact you when you were in school?

During class, students should be focused on learning, not calming down their neurotic helicopter parents.

[Stoney (Yung Man) @montellchillems]

I can not stress enough. We are in debt 40 trillion dollars.

[Austin @bostonaustin]

He’s not a bad play caller but the problem is you can almost guarantee it’s going to be run-run-pass until we are down 2 possessions (10-0 vs Bears, 13-3 vs Dolphins, 14-0 vs Packers)

[Ryan @NEPatsFan57]

@MarkDondero Greg Bedard is a retard. Kinda rhymes too. Bedard the retard.

[Juampi @juampitech]

I'm never deleting this app

[Carlos A. Lopez @LosTalksPats]

Lions HC Dan Campbell on the #Patriots:

“I just know if that was us [coming off a loss like that], you’re gonna be ready to go this week. We know this opponent is a good opponent. They were in the Super Bowl last year… We know what we’re getting ready to face here. That hornet’s nest has been kicked.”

[Ari Meirov @MySportsUpdate]

Former NFL HC Rex Ryan was arrested Wednesday morning in Nashville after allegedly running over the feet of two pedestrians with his pickup truck last week.

Police say Ryan continued driving before the pedestrians caught up to him at a red light. He allegedly got out, argued with them, and drove away without exchanging information.

Ryan faces six misdemeanor charges, including leaving the scene of an accident, failing to provide information or aid, and failing to obey traffic signals.

[Dean Turner @DeanTTraining]

This is what the average guy walking down the street would look like under 135 lbs

Zero troll

The AVERAGE DUDE is getting STAPLED by a single plate per side

[Sell everything @yoshispeninsula]

a kind of wild thing I learned recently is that a lot of "water use" numbers people throw around for data centers are mostly literally just the staff using toilets and stuff

[Sunny @sunnyright]

I don’t like Biden but my default policy response here is we start airstrikes immediately on the attackers

[Hunter Ash @ArtemisConsort]

This was by far the strangest thing about moving to SF. Contra the standard “yokel in the big city” story, I was mostly surprised by how janky everything is here. Middle class Oklahoma houses were mostly built or remodeled like 2 years ago, everything neat and functional and smooth. You can buy one for like 100k. Here, you pay 3k/month for a studio and it’s got holes in the walls and mold patches and the power randomly fails. There’s no parking ever, anywhere. Bums are just wandering by at all hours. I grew up with very average people, and it wasn’t uncommon to have a three-car garage with a jet ski or ATV in it. The difference in physical standards of living is insane. You’d have to be worth like $50 million to have a decent redneck home in SF. Yeah restaurants or whatever but I can buy bone marrow and prosciutto at the grocery store.

Truly feels like a 3rd world country: crazy amenities for the ultra-wealthy and disfunction otherwise.

[Craftsman Redux @Craftsman_Redux]

Never let a crisis go to waste to make a sale.

From a December 1860 newspaper.

[Robert @49thandBlvd]

Seems like something you’d see at a gas station pump

[Gator Jay @stupiddretard]

LARPs that have to end

1. Edmund Fitzgerald glazers
2. Widespread Panic listeners
3. F1 viewers
4. Rooting for a college you never attended

[McNeil @REFLOG18]

PEAK #MACTION ALERT

Miami flagged for unsportsmanlike after showing multiple uprights on the scoreboard behind the actual uprights.