Sarah Needleman (Taylor's Version)

For legal purposes, everything on here is a joke.
She/Her/They

[rose ☕️🌼💻 @icedcortado_]

Barista hot take of the day

The person in line behind you can afford their Starbucks. End the pay it forward chain and tip the baristas instead.

[One Less Than Perfect Shot @LessShot]

TAKEN (2008)
Cinematography by Michel Abramowicz
Directed by Pierre Morel
Submitted by @Stiggybird99 and @AllBranCereal

[Christina Grace @C_GraceT]

The most embarrassing thing about Wordle is that when I don't get it in three I am convinced I am about to learn a brand new word and then it's like...THOSE

[Gaurav @gvedak]

Still furious they chose MAROON 5 for the super bowl in atlanta

[NFL @NFL]

THAT. WAS. INCREDIBLE.

Dre. Snoop. Mary. Eminem. Kendrick. 50 Cent. What a show. #PepsiHalftime

[5-4 Podcast @fivefourpod]

💕to all who celebrate💕

[rm @sprainhill]

With inflation at 7.5%, you lose half your money in 9 years. The only way to outperform that consistently, that I have found, is crypto. Just this year I’ve already lost half my money.

[Cory Woodroof @CoryWoodroof47]

I hope the Atlanta Falcons can go to the Super Bowl someday. It's a shame they've never been before. Just awful. Just a shame they've never been. Just a shame.

Just a shame.

[Sarah Needleman (Taylor's Version) @Needlemeister]

Oh

[Mia Moore @StopTweetingMia]

If you're a straight guy who got way too invested in Max and Chloe's romance in Life Is Strange, no you're not.

[AdequateEmily @ Fantasia 2026 @AdequateEmily]

She lives a very different life later on.

[Eddy Burback @eddyburback]

how could this have happened??
he tweets rick and morty memes…i thought he was just like me😔

[Gale Na @poisonjr]

SUFJAN STEVENS: I was kissed, I was pegged, by my very best friend

LYRIC ANNOTATION: Sufjan is referencing the Betrayal of Christ;

[Keaton Patti @KeatonPatti]

Wow.

[Zack Fox @zackfox]

all that twerkin shit cool but if a stripper did the dougie butt nekked I would throw everything I own

[abby govindan @abbygov]

people ask if I do an Indian accent for my parents in stand up and the answer is no. Racism aside my parents accent is the least funny thing about them. One time when I was crying in public, my mom said “can u please stop sobbing people are gonna think we’re human trafficking u”

[Everything Georgia @GAFollowers]

If GTA 6 is in Atlanta the first thing I'm doing is crashing a plane into The Varsity.

[Sarah Needleman (Taylor's Version) @Needlemeister]

Finally someone brave enough to speak the truth

[Armand Domalewski @ArmandDoma]

Dave Chappelle was so angry that a housing project had an affordable component that he threatened to pull all his business investments out of the town, successfully reverting the project to just luxury single family homes

[The Falcoholic @TheFalcoholic]

My Twitter experience would improve exponentially if I was not constantly reminded of past suffering

[@Magic_Arcanum @Magic_Arcanum]

If you are a Magic player who won't get vaccinated because it's "not 100% effective" then you are never again allowed to mention how "fetch lands thin your deck."