Nicole Blair

[Anti Joke Apple @AntiJokerApple]

Nothing rhymes with orange?

False.

Nothing and orange do not rhyme.

[Nicole Blair @NicNicDoo]

@ea_peters Love you best friend ❤️

[Nicole Blair @NicNicDoo]

@ea_peters Am I wrong? 😉

[Nicole Blair @NicNicDoo]

@ea_peters Good to see you’re still alive enough to tweet despite allegedly lying dead in your bed. Love you, best friend 😘

[Andy Cohen @Andy]

@realDonaldTrump Maybe you can get the Russians to help them?

[Josh Peck @ItsJoshPeck]

When butterflies are in love, do they feel humans in their stomachs?

[Anti Joke Apple @AntiJokerApple]

You know what really hurts my feelings? Nerve damage.

[Anti Joke Apple @AntiJokerApple]

I want it to be 2004 again and come home from school, grab a granola bar, watch Lizzie McGuire and not hate myself.

[Nicole Blair @NicNicDoo]

@DadsPuns @ea_peters I died at this 😂

[Bargain Hunters @Bargains90]

What do you call a chicken staring at a lettuce?

Chicken sees a salad.

[Anti Joke Apple @AntiJokerApple]

An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing because owls can't talk.

[Anti Joke Apple @AntiJokerApple]

What does a dog and a fork have in common? They both have tails, except the fork.

[Nicole Blair @NicNicDoo]

@ea_peters You are my favorite. I love you, half scoop 🥔🔥

[Bargain Hunters @Bargains90]

People say my hobby of filling farm animals up with helium is morally reprehensible.

But I say, whatever floats your goat.

[Nicole Blair @NicNicDoo]

242 hours of 2018 very well spent..thanks @ScottyMcCreery

[Nicole Blair @NicNicDoo]

@ea_peters Your flirt game is impeccable 👌🏼

[Nicole Blair @NicNicDoo]

@ea_peters Honestly I thought it was obvious enough that you’d call yourself out on it 😂😘❤️

[Sean Lowe @SeanLowe09]

The first day of sweatpants weather is truly the most magical day of the year.

[Ben Rosen @ben_rosen]

REPUBLICANS: who can be sure about what happened 36 years ago

ALSO REPUBLICANS: when the founding fathers put a comma in this sentence they meant we can have assault rifles