PulselessPassions

[PulselessPassions @NoPulsePassion]

Real empathy is ideal.

Tactical empathy is real empathy for a focused situation to solve problems for everyone to walk away happy.

Fake empathy is manipulation.

Fake empathy is worse than no empathy.

[PulselessPassions @NoPulsePassion]

@_nomadic_soul Do you think there's something biologically there by design for why women carry the baby in their womb rather than men which counters this claim?

[PulselessPassions @NoPulsePassion]

@xoeeie There's a big dog not barking.

They have four young kids. Who was up with the kids at night? Who handles the finances? Who is the pickier eater? Who drives the family everywhere? Who handles yard work or repairs? Her mistakes?

She's keeping score of only what she cares.

[PulselessPassions @NoPulsePassion]

@_nomadic_soul I offered to stay home with the kids. We'd have to give up the lifestyle. Her career wasn't as lucrative.

She was hurt and claimed I forced her to stay home and didn't respect her career.

She started her own business. I gave what I could. She said I didn't support it.

[PulselessPassions @NoPulsePassion]

@_nomadic_soul @randplaty @arieleggebeen Incentivize community building and families. Stop pushing college. Most degrees aren't needed/used. Enforce high standards for remaining on social net programs. Enforce high standards on government run policies to eliminate fraud.

[PulselessPassions @NoPulsePassion]

Once we were married it became evident. Pleasure, ease, and her control and selfishness were what mattered.

She saw her mom as walked over. That led to self protection.

I saw what I wanted to. The hope of what this cute, smart, and funny woman and I could be together.

[PulselessPassions @NoPulsePassion]

There was an interview I heard, and I wish I could remember who said it. They were talking about how they make decisions about the family.

The marriage wasn't the number 1 priority.
The kids weren't the number 1 priority.
No parent was the number 1 priority.
The family was.

[PulselessPassions @NoPulsePassion]

I thought I had the conversations before to know we were headed down that path. I'm very much a "team first" guy. I don't care about my own success.

I didn't pay attention to her actions enough. I paid attention to her words. They were at odds.

[PulselessPassions @NoPulsePassion]

@_nomadic_soul @randplaty @arieleggebeen Research has shown that societies which have higher female education and salaries have lower than needed birth rates to survive long term.

Even Nordic countries don't have enough kids to replace death.

The question is: Do you want your culture to survive or not?

[PulselessPassions @NoPulsePassion]

Girl I met that apologized to me for having an off night. Made me realize I'm worth more than what I've put myself through.

Oldest asking me why I am still married.

Youngest hearing my wife call me a pussy and not a real man.

Always excusing her anger. Still here.

[PulselessPassions @NoPulsePassion]

Dated a girl that I couldn't say I loved her. She didn't need me. She wanted me. She could leave at any time. I couldn't fathom her desiring me long term. I let her go to avoid being hurt because I didn't value myself.

[໊ @i23yvi3]

My uncle told me, “Women today are too independent, Men don't feel needed anymore” I asked him, “Why does a woman being capable of taking care of herself make you feel less like a man?” He said, “Because men are supposed to provide” I asked, “Then what happens when she can provide for herself?” He said, “She'll stop respecting him” I looked at him and said, “Or maybe she’ll finally have the freedom to respect a man because she genuinely admires him, not because she depends on him” He went quiet. I wasn't trying to win the argument. I just wanted him to hear how strange that sounds when you say it out loud.

[PulselessPassions @NoPulsePassion]

I'm still not sure why she can be that calm, caring person in crisis. But selfish in day to day, but she is.

20+ years, I'm still with her. Paperwork is sitting there to be filed. Family events making it hard to pull the trigger.

[PulselessPassions @NoPulsePassion]

@dovidfeldman Definitely. Sometimes it doesn't matter how we show up, the psychology of the person we are with will impact their perception.

I made plenty of mistakes. My wife also had a history of viewing everyone in a negative light. I was fighting an uphill battle.

[PulselessPassions @NoPulsePassion]

@emilykmay Do you think there are no women who settle for men for safety nets? Or women who can't clearly communicate what they need or want? Or women who don't care and just see someone they can take advantage of?

There are men like that. Why not women?

[PulselessPassions @NoPulsePassion]

The battle of the sexes is an impossible battle for either side to win. It relies on preferences of what is of more important.

Its a battle of egos and distraction.

[PulselessPassions @NoPulsePassion]

If you hold people to a high standard of response to the chaos you create, you are set every one up for failure.

[PulselessPassions @NoPulsePassion]

@dadstartingover The serial sucks.

There's no real answer when the other party is high conflict and avoidant.

She'll do chores that I do just to say she does them sometimes.

She'll say I choose to do things for the kids then want credit when she does them.