Not Cheaper By The Dozen

Surviving the chaos of 12 kids while navigating the wild world of politics! Join us for daily doses of family antics, dad jokes, and political musings.

[Not Cheaper By The Dozen @NotCheapByDozen]

Alert! Any Congress member who votes against defunding the Department of Education should resign IMMEDIATELY! For the last 20 years, we've been homeschooling our dozen kids, and let me tell you, our property taxes are basically funding a 'woke' parade! Why should my hard-earned cash pay for other people's kids to learn about... whatever it is they're learning? I've got enough on my plate with my 12! Time to stop this madness! @DOGECommittee @DOGE

[Not Cheaper By The Dozen @NotCheapByDozen]

#lumo 🤷‍♂️

[Putrid Finder @DailyPutrid]

🤔 Lumo AI app (from proton) says Trump is not the sitting president ?? #Trump #glitch

[Not Cheaper By The Dozen @NotCheapByDozen]

Wow, it’s already April, don’t judge me—I’ve been busy with 12 kids They say time flies when you're having fun... but with 12 kids, I'm just trying to keep up! One minute it's January, the next I'm yelling, Who put the cat in the dryer?!' 🤪 ( PS the cat is fine)

[Not Cheaper By The Dozen @NotCheapByDozen]

@GuntherEagleman @SenatorSlotkin 💯

[Not Cheaper By The Dozen @NotCheapByDozen]

@elonmusk Can the Cybertruck handle 12 kids, or should I start looking into the Tesla Semi?

[Not Cheaper By The Dozen @NotCheapByDozen]

Weekend: 12 kids, 1 house, 0 sanity. Sorry If you needed me, I was hiding in the pantry with snacks and earplugs. 🫠

[Not Cheaper By The Dozen @NotCheapByDozen]

@MrBeast World’s Fastest Runner vs my 12 kids on sugar!

[Not Cheaper By The Dozen @NotCheapByDozen]

@MrBeast 12 kids over here, and I can confirm being broke is NOT easier. Cheaper by the dozen? More like *bankrupt by the dozen.* Just enabled BTC donations so I can finally buy some MrBeast Burgers and chocolate—we’re currently splitting one burger and bar between all of us.

[Not Cheaper By The Dozen @NotCheapByDozen]

Bedtime at my house

[Not Cheaper By The Dozen @NotCheapByDozen]

12 kids and everyone’s sick? It’s less of a house and more of a germ-sharing co-op at this point. I’m not a parent anymore—I’m the head nurse, janitor, and quarantine officer. 🩺🧹🚨

[Not Cheaper By The Dozen @NotCheapByDozen]

Social Security at 70: The ultimate game of 'Will I or Won't I?' It's like waiting for a piñata, but instead of candy, it's your own money... and instead of a stick, you just have to survive long enough to collect it. 🎉💰

[Not Cheaper By The Dozen @NotCheapByDozen]

@elonmusk Just abolish the IRS already. I’ll calculate my own taxes: Step 1 - I have $0. Step 2 - You can’t tax $0. Step 3 - Problem solved. 🎉 #AbolishTheIRS

[Not Cheaper By The Dozen @NotCheapByDozen]

@ElonMuskAOC Living paycheck to paycheck is like a twisted love story—me and my ramen noodles against the world, while the government swoops in like a tax-hungry ex snagging every spare dime. Add 12 kids to the mix? That’s not a struggle, that’s a full-on reality show

[Not Cheaper By The Dozen @NotCheapByDozen]

Still alive, just haven’t posted since the Jurassic era. 12 kids means I’m juggling diapers, homework, and a rogue chicken nugget stuck in the couch. I’m fine, just busy

[Not Cheaper By The Dozen @NotCheapByDozen]

There goes my bonus

[Not Cheaper By The Dozen @NotCheapByDozen]

Govt took 4K from my bonus—don’t need it for my family, nah. It’s funding a better cause: USAID for transgender illegal immigrants. Kids’ll be fine, it’s big-picture stuff!

[Not Cheaper By The Dozen @NotCheapByDozen]

0.05% of US families have 12+ kids. Taxes hit like a drum solo on my books, shredding my bonus money . Govt says, ‘Big family? Cute, but pay up!

[Not Cheaper By The Dozen @NotCheapByDozen]

@DOGE_IRS Sent DM

[Not Cheaper By The Dozen @NotCheapByDozen]

@TheBabylonBee Ah, perfect! A van for people like me with 12 kids—finally, a Tesla that doubles as a school bus and a panic room!

[Not Cheaper By The Dozen @NotCheapByDozen]

@elonmusk Looks like Social Security is funding the Cullen family reunion. Someone check if 'sparkling' is a valid reason for disability benefits! 🧛‍♂️💸

[Not Cheaper By The Dozen @NotCheapByDozen]

@MrBeast Wow, $10 million wired just like that! Meanwhile, I’m over here trying to figure out how to split a $20 pizza between my 12 kids. 😂 Congrats to the winner though!