not reida ✨

not a backup account. I do healthcare stuff. Views mine and are not the views of my employer or Taylor Swift. parody. i’m so tired.

[not reida ✨ @NotReida]

if u look like this dm me

[not reida ✨ @NotReida]

@karterAKA they are surprisingly in a loving polyamorous triad

[not reida ✨ @NotReida]

@Highway_Ham @CrimCartier pristine tweet. thank you.

[death angel @angel_0f_deathx]

God forbid you use Twitter to hit on a former president’s hot son

[not reida ✨ @NotReida]

how my fiance expects me to get up and check the thermostat to make sure the AC isn’t on before I crack the bedroom window open 1” when I wake up at 3am because our room is stuffy as hell and approximately 1 billion degrees

[not reida ✨ @NotReida]

hey @HunterBiden can you teach me how to paint?

[Fuck You I Quit @fuckyouiquit]

The best part about Hunter Biden on twitter is not only is it the funniest shit I've seen in awhile, I've learned that dude can actually paint. This guy fucks.

[not reida ✨ @NotReida]

@Trump17Q2024 @HunterBiden @OldManLondre Yikes. I hope that one day you experience happiness.

[not reida ✨ @NotReida]

@lumaxingout @faultlinemeg I work 100% remotely and this would not be possible for me at all like????

[Hunter Biden 2028 @HunterFor2028]

CATTURD WILL BE DEPORTED ON DAY ONE OF THE HUNTER BIDEN ADMIN

[b @dangbozo]

my cat is so codependent she has to wake me up so she can go downstairs and eat a plant she’s not supposed to

[Hunter Biden @HunterBiden]

@Boilers32 It most definitely was not. I would never have forgotten my drugs.

[not reida ✨ @NotReida]

@thiojoe Do not use Oregon zip codes, either!!! For the same reason!!!!

[not reida ✨ @NotReida]

@HunterBiden hell yeah bro

[not reida ✨ @NotReida]

@XAppUser @Expose_Society My brother in Christ, let’s use our brains here.

There’s no way Hunter Biden have would *left* cocaine behind anywhere if he was in Crackhead Mode. Come on now.

[not reida ✨ @NotReida]

@zal01 @offbeatorbit Yeah there’s a DRASTIC skill level gap between the ones that learned at 15ish crowd, at least in my circle.
Even though we’re all in our 30s-40s now, the ones that learned at 19+ are still terrible drivers.
The ones that learned at 15-16 are all decent or even great drivers.

[not reida ✨ @NotReida]

@offbeatorbit 💯
Also I’m convinced there’s something about driving that requires a lesser developed brain. In my experience, anyone who learned to drive after the age of 19 is just stuck being a horrible driver forever.

[not reida ✨ @NotReida]

@MoglordX @KyleMatovcik Just because someone qualifies for something like this does not mean they can afford it. Don’t encourage this nonsense.

(Also you forgot about taxes, PMI, HOA, and home insurance…and god forbid they need to do a repair of any kind.)

[not reida ✨ @NotReida]

@ginasfsydnee it goes away if u take daraprim

[No filter Skin @NoFilterSkin]

You ever look at your cat and feel so overwhelmed with love that you just KNOW you have toxoplasmosis?

[not reida ✨ @NotReida]

i know taylor swift is not also sitting at her dining room table using a caked up golden cat paper towel holder to her hold floral wire while she’s DIYing weird shit for her wedding but like…she could be

[ValarMorghulis @Kupangende]

“Nothing from my side, thanks” - my wedding vows