I hate how you're one of the few people who can silence the voices and anxieties in my mind. Where I can peacefully stay quiet or noisy without being judged. Who I cam easily talk about anything with. Someone I don't need to be always guarded.
Whatever effort I put into, its never enough, I'm never enough. There will always be someone who says something but what hurts more is when that someone is who you look up to, who you have so much admiration and respect, who you thought will be there to support you.
Work has started to feel so heavy and dragging again. I don't feel like what I'm doing is correct and all I just do is become a burden. I can't even rant since I have no one else who I cam truly trust at the moment who won't think I'm being dramatic or overacting.
Does not means I can easily laugh Im not professional at all. Respect does not come from always being serious. Ive got the award to prove that what I am now and how I approach my work and workmates is okay. No ones complaining except for you. Yet your input still hurts so bad...
Why am I always like this? I give and give and give but Im still the one who ends up being hurt. I never asked for anything. Not even the pain. Just a bit of respect will do.