OffensiveHaiku.com

The Poetry of the Damned

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@AdrianaTX1m I think the gremlin on her right leg turns into baby Yoda.

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@GeneralPatton83 You just made me google “what does a series of skull emojis mean?”

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@Kinza1278 Who the hell would date someone glued to a wall like that?

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@ErikUnchained You wealthy bastards!

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@midniteMagiC79 This is the kind of stuff that's going on in a Margaritaville retirement community right now.

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@guideforlovers Why the fuck are you asking this question? Sounds like you're panicking and looking for a way out, you insecure Douche Nozzle. If what you're describing is true and the sex is good, fucking marry her.

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@HubbaBubbaYo Yeah, OK Sorbo. Try going one on one with a Canada Goose.

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@NotTodayEric Worst experience with this: I had "Hot Cop" by the Village People stuck in my head for a three weeks in grade eleven. And no, I'm not gay.

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@LorenzoTheCat She put on a Cat costume for our sins.

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@otokyo Mines only 9 out of 10. You don't want to know what I did with the garden hose.

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@MDkabir662843 Enter the Canada Goose.

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@AndieAndie54183 This is 100% true and if they say it isn't they're just in denial.

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@MomsPostingLs That's bad when the robot's already thinking "How do I get this bitch to consent to an Ethical Non-Monogamous Relationship?"

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@Meggiicosplay Adidas - All Day I Dream About Sex. They've finally embraced it.

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@cravedcuddle All paths lead to Damnation. Just pick a lane, Trickle.

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@BattleByrd There's no way this hotel room is not in Germany.

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@namzyvibez Whatever, try doing that with a Canada Goose. Then I'd be impressed.

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@namzyvibez That's your two hander big boy right there.

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Haiku #32 – The Zen of Sex Tourism

Vietnamese whore
Why do you look at me so?
It's only fisting