Bose Bamidele

Writer, screen writer, humorist, Mummy!

[Bose Bamidele @OkoIyaWon]

@Jayf_byyou I was scared 😱

[Bose Bamidele @OkoIyaWon]

I jumped awake at exactly 2:40am today, my bladder wasn't pressed but my spirit was pressed!
I knew there was something!🥺

There had to be something, I sensed it, I even perceived it and I didn't like the smell, very close to the scent of danger.😞

I rose and went to my children's room, they were sleeping like their alarm would not wail in 3 hours! I muttered "Epele o in Jesus name" and exited.

I returned to my room, sat down briefly so that blood could flow to my brain and discernment coul flow to my spirit !

Then I got it!

My Netflix is due today!

Ha! Oh God of Obedeodom! 🤲
I quickly ran to GTB to remove my 5K before Netflix turn my money to imbecile 🥺🫣

I just thank God for nudging me awake loganjo oru! Even though I couldn't return to sleep, it is better than waking up to 2500...

#OkoIyaWon

[Bose Bamidele @OkoIyaWon]

@Iam_PeeChee Victory forever! 🥹😂

[Bose Bamidele @OkoIyaWon]

How I almost choked in my sleep...

A true testimony.😔

I'm sharing because this might help someone, especially because it happened twice in just one week.

Two salient points to note, I cannot sleep without pulling a clothe over my face, I cover not just my body, but my face too, especially when I'm alone. Its the only way I can lure myself to sleep.

Secondly, I have been ill and trying to get better... 🥺

The drama started because I was trying everything possible to see that I completed my dosage of my prescribed medication, since the sickness affected my appetite and I wasnt eating enough food, I decided to help myself as much as possible, for my medication - so I got a crate of eggs. 😑

I like eggs only when I fry them for yam, I am not a fan of boiled eggs, stewed or plain. I only take one once in a while, sometimes I can't even finish one. But I told myself I'd do anything to get well, hence the plan was to eat at least six eggs daily with my other meals. (As I have seen other people do!)

On Tuesday as my children prepared for school, I begged them to boil six eggs for me, that I'd eat all 6 before the end of the day! Give or take 350 calories.

That was how my son boiled six eggs and served me two with a bottle of yogurt that morning.😔

I ate two, pushing down with yogurt.

Later that afternoon, I forced myself to eat two more and it seemed like I was gonna diɛ! It was hard to eat boiled eggs.

That night, my son brought the last two, I couldn't even look at the plate, I begged him to take it away.

That night, I slept. Under my blue blanket. Only for me to be choking suddenly.

I began to gasp for breath from under the clothe, thrown back to life from dreamland.

God of my fathers!😭

I jumped awake, still under the blanket, gasping... something was wrong! I was hitting my chest to call myself back from the in between of the among of life and death!!!

I finally shoved the clothe off my face and took in as much air as possible, panting... I almost lost my lifɛ!

My own fart almost called me to glory!
As in, I almost collect the eyes of sleep to the eyes of death, because of the fart that escaped from my own body! But for God!

As in, isó fẹ pamí😭

😑😑😑

Ordinarily, I wouldn't share, but I have learnt that for every pain, there is a purpose! And the purpose of that painful encounter is for someone out there, namely you to hear this - don't eat eggs!
Don't eat boiled eggs!
You will fart!
Your fart will almost collect the life that it didn't give you!

I am a testament that God is good!🙏

I now engage in eyeing contests with the eggs in my kitchen. Never again!

When I buy correct yam, I will fry eggs, but I don't wanna gonna see boiled eggs again until I'm 50!
Once beaten, forever shy.

Tenks.

Yours Truly But Not Truly Yours 🫣

#OkoIyaWon
#GratefulForLife

[Bose Bamidele @OkoIyaWon]

Smallie🤍

[Bose Bamidele @OkoIyaWon]

Happy Sunday 🤍✨️

[Bose Bamidele @OkoIyaWon]

@peonies1420701 Add 16 😁😁😁😁

[Bose Bamidele @OkoIyaWon]

I'm 41, I weigh 47Kilos. You nko? 😒

[Bose Bamidele @OkoIyaWon]

SUCH A BABY
I have always loved to stay away from celebrities, because of my stubbornness and semi-demi pride.
I love to be able to control my own thoughts and narratives, I don't want to be influenced by the idea of faves and stuff...so, I write for them and leave.

The only celebrity I can dress up to say "I'm coming to your house" is Mr. Macaroni - whom I absofuckinglutely adore.

I love being able to write about any and everyone without the fear of "My food go reduce" this is why I stay away, I no get fave. In fact, I no dey watch film, my TV subscription was last done on April 3 2022.

When clients say "Have you seen this movie?" I hurriedly run to watch it... and most times, they are international recommendations. Na why Netflix still dey my phone.😑

When ToyinAbraham started reaching out to me last year, I took time to respond, I had worked with her before but not one on one, this time however, she was reaching out to me because she had encountered me by herself on Facebook.

If you have been here for a while, you know I have never come here to hail anyone, anything I wanna write, I write. If na this person I wan write about, I go write, if na this person I go still write. Nothing influences or manipulates my pen.
Eventually, I responded to her and that was how I started to write for her one on one... starting with Fruit Covenant 😋

When she called to say "I want you to write my December movie." I was wary again, but she stood on business, I even gave the "my children" excuse, but she said "Ok, I'll get you a three bedroom apartment, bring them."

At that point, I no get choice.
Why was I reluctant?🤔

I don enter this Nollywood a while now and I am scared of any close relationship because of the things we hear and the ones we know or the ones we think we know.

And for three days while we worked on BESTIE, I saw a different Toyin, and I told her something... "you are such a child."
She laughed and asked "Ki lode to fi sọ bẹ?" (Why do you say so?)

I explained why I said it to her, I saw a woman who is mature in age, successful, but inside is just a child, and a child is just carefree, not thinking beyond the moment, would say things he wants to say without thinking or weighing it so much, would play with animate and inanimate things, would laugh at silly things and really believe they were funny, even wonder why you are not laughing.
Sometimes she's laughing and I'm looking like "Ki lo n pa woman yi lerin?"

That was when I blurted "You're such a child." And many things came into perspective for me.

When she was shoving food (literally) down my throat in the middle of the night because she thought I was not eating enough, I screamed and slapped her hand, she stood there laughing like "I did it" and she was proud of herself.
I stood there, oyel all over my face, a load of fried egg in my mouth, panting like a heifer. One look and she started laughing.

We all just started laughing like chickens in that kitchen.

When we were doing revisions and more relaxed, I was hitting her in my usual way, if I dey gist you, you go collect steady bèatings 😂😂 I was hiting her with every laughter, she looked at me and said "Kuku pa mi, you sha know that this leg is paining me?"

I just switched to hitting the other leg until she turned to the room and said "Weere ni Bose"
We argued about her story, went crazy about casting, even did conferences about title...for months.

Toyin Abraham is flawed, imperfect, stubborn and also very talented and kind...
I still wake up to her plenty voice notes and missed calls.
One day, I missed plenty calls, and when I opened her voice note it was "are you angry at me?" 😂😂😂

I just laughed and said to myself "such a baby!"

To this Baby, Toyin Abraham, happy birthday Sis ♥️
God bless you, always.
Ọkan yin a ba'lẹ.
Alubarika lori #BESTIE. 🤲

#OkoIyaWon

[Bose Bamidele @OkoIyaWon]

He looked up and saw me standing there just looking, he waved and smiled at me. Slowly, I raised my hand and waved back, then the clouds, and the rain, and I let it fall... my heart broke anew as I watched my first love disappear forever!

...
In 2009, I typed out his full name on FB and searched, I found him, I did not hesitate, I sent a message describing myself and he replied a day later...

"My wife, I remember you."

Ha, e pain me!

The END.

Tenks ✌️

Yours Truly, but Not Truly Yours 🥴

#OkoIyaWon
#TheHusbandOfTheirMothers
#MrsButNotMarried

[Bose Bamidele @OkoIyaWon]

In the degree of heartbreaks, I think this is my most painful heartbreak experience.

I met him on a Sunday in 1995, typically, cos every significant event in my life has happened on a Sunday, starting with my birth. 🥴

I remember it well like it happened yesterday... I had opened the door of our apartment and stepped into the corridor when I saw him coming up the stairs, No, I heard him before I saw him; he was singing "Take control, take control, take control my Redeemer, take control" a song by C and S Ayo ni o!

Then, I saw him. He was lean, tall, almost fragile looking, his legs looked too long, longer than his torso. His face was dark, his head almost square-ish. I stopped and stared and my heart did a double back-flip, completely forgetting its original job description!🤧

I watched as he walked away into the apartment directly opposite ours, belonging to Mr and Mrs Oluwo, he spared me only one glance.

Ha!
I went down the stairs, but my heart didn't go with me.
I did not know what to make of the feeling, it almost felt like I had been struck by an illness, it felt like something was wrong with me, like a fever, or malaria, the urge to cry was so potent that my eyes clouded everytime I saw him, I would quickly lift my head up to the heavens to stop the impending rain!

How can that?
When he is not onions?🤷‍♀️

I gathered that he was Mr Oluwo's nephew and would be staying for a while. Every time I heard that door open, I would fly out of our apartment to see if it was him.
My joy knew no bounds when he was registered in my school, Blessing Nursery and Primary school...I was in primary 5 and he was in primary 6.

Yes, I was 10 almost 11, he was 12 and that's your cup of tea cos love don't care! 🥴

We became good friends, he would fly to my class to gist with me, he barely walked, he was a runner and a flyer! I remember a particular episode that has refused to leave my head.
It was the end of that session/term, he was in the school for just one term.

On the Assembly ground, the headmistress, Mrs Omolagba was calling out the 1st, 2nd and 3rd positions as was the custom...the moment she finished with primary 4, it was the turn of primary 5, I looked at Ayo, iyen love mi 🥺, and I saw him pointing at me, telling his friends that I was the most brilliant in my class!

My head swelled and when my name was eventually called, topping the class, I saw him beam and clap excitedly! Proudly!
In fact, the victory of that first position was not as sweet as the pride and joy I saw in Ayo's face!

It meant we had something.
That his heart did back-flips too every time he saw me!
That his eyes clouded and threatened rain.
Abi? ☻️

I was wrong!
Was I really? 🤔

One evening, sitting at the verandah, enjoying fresh air, well, not really...lets just say enjoying Ayo's gists and cackling laughter, Sade Kazeem appeared.

Sade with the soft and sonorous voice. She lived in the house too but not on the same floor as Ayo and I.
Sade had come to give Mr Oluwo some money for NEPA or something, she delivered the money to Ayo and turned away immediately.

I saw him look at her longingly as she went, like he was going to cry, like he had typhoid, then I saw his chest rise and fall!
Haaa! The back-flips!
Then his eyes were glittering! Cloudy!
Oh Lord of Mephiboseth! 🤧

Everything I felt for him, with him, he felt for Sade!

When he eventually turned to me, the look in his eyes burned!
Yes my heart did the usual flips, but this time, each flip hurt!
My eyes clouded again, and before I could throw back my head to stop the rain, I felt the first trickle!

Thankfully, I was shielded by the arms of darkness... pain clogged my chest and I tapped it as if to stop the hurt.
My heart, my beautiful virgin heart was breaking and I could do nothing about it!

And when one Sunday, Ayo was leaving for Mayflower school to begin a new life in High school, I watched with dry eyes...

#OkoIyawon

[Bose Bamidele @OkoIyaWon]

I disposed the sauce and packed their plates to one side.

Brethren, I will jump over the drama of the three days in that hotel, the drama of what happened in Ibadan and how I slept in my yellow ankara for three days even though I had other clothes in my polybag, I will jump straight to the fact that chicken curry sauce is not for Ekiti and Kwara people ✌️

Tenks 🤍

Yours truly, but not truly yours;

#OkoIyawon
#TheHusbandofTheirMothers

[Bose Bamidele @OkoIyaWon]

I became a bread slicer after secondary school? Years into my life as a factory worker, my brilliance shined forth 😉and I became a part time "auditor" (for lack of a better term) for my boss.

In January 2005, my boss informed me that the books were ready to be audited and I would need to go away to a safe place to do the books.

Before then, all I had to do was lock myself up in one of the offices to do these books, but this time Oga said he would prefer me to go away, away from prying eyes, he would prefer if no one saw his accounts.
The books were indeed plenty, books of about eight bakeries!
"Ki lo suggest?"
Oga asked me...

I had no idea what to suggest to oga so I just stared blankly at him.

Days later, oga said he had booked a suite for me at Premiere Hotels Ibadan, I would find my way to Ibadan on Friday and he would come pick me up on Sunday.

To the glory of God, I announced to my family that "work" was carrying me to Ibadan o, they knew my boss, so leaving home was not a problem.

Luckily for me, I didn't have to carry the heavy books, according to my boss, the books would be waiting for me there. (I should have asked how 🤧)

I arrived at the hotel in one very yellow Ankara and a black poly bag ☻️🥴 (the polybag even cut before I got to Mokola 🤦‍♀️)
The polybag contained my luggage... I wore my beloved black kito slippers (Do not picture me🚫)
Nobody told me that Premiere hotel was a big hotel.

The moment I stepped into the lobby abi na reception, I knew wí pé, I was overdressed 🤣.

I walked to the front desk, strangliɲg my polybag, and told the lady my name, she looked at me and frowned, imagine, already frowning without seeing my kito and polybag🥴 I had to hold the polybag by its throat since the hand haff cut 😑🫩

She opened a book and in no time, gave me a key, told me to use the "lift".

What a Wow! 😂
Things wee happen today o. Lift ke? I walked to the "lift" and stood there, watching people come and go. I made no move to enter, cos in all of my twenty biuriful years, I had not used a lift!
Moments later, a security guy that had been eyeing me and my "flayad" skirt walked up to me.

"Where are you going?"
I showed him my room card, he nodded and with his help, I got into the elevator, he knew better than to leave me alone so he kuku followed me and led me to my door, in fact, he opened the door for me.

When I entered my room, I dropped my polybag on the bed and looked around excitedly...
I was just using teeth to do "Wow! Wow! Wow!"
My room overlooked the pool and I briefly watched people diving... I mentally said my "God forbid" and left the window.

Daz how I saw the menu list by the telephone! I now remembered that oga had said I could order anything...

I was hungry!!!

I carried menu, I saw orisirisi of food with simple names... Rice and pepper, jollof rice, Rice with vegetables, even pounded yam; brethren, I dinor pick those.
I went to Rice with curry sauce and chicken. 🥴

Oh God of Mephiboseth!

Ha! In my mind, I just imagined stew with plenty curry 🤦‍♀️and I kuku like curry 😁

These people arrived with the plenty trays😭
I opened the first one, I saw a plate of very fine white rice, in the same plate, pineapple was diced finely, the plate also had some groundnuts, I don't know why 🤷‍♀️and there was dodo, also diced finely...

I smiled happily as I threw some groundnuts into my mouth and chewed happily!
Daz how I opened the second plate...

Wait, why did this people serve me gbegiri and chicken? 🤦‍♀️🥴
How will I use gbegiri to eat rice fuhguhsake. I looked at the rice and the gbegiri, I put one finger in the gbegiri and tasted... tueh!

So na the chicken curry sauce be this?
Dammit! 🥺🫩

Toh, Alhamdulilah 🤲
I picked the chicken, went to the bathroom and rinsed off the gbegiri/curry sauce...
It was on that day I knew that rice and groundnut na good combo 🤧
I sha ate white rice with pineapples and groundnut and dodo.
I was using water to push it down like paracetamol.

👇👇

[Bose Bamidele @OkoIyaWon]

It's the kitchen cabinet for me 😂😂😂

#2012 lookimg like a century ago.
Chai! Oral B, 200 😐

[Bose Bamidele @OkoIyaWon]

@peonies1420701 🫣🫣🫣😂

[Bose Bamidele @OkoIyaWon]

You know the kind of life where girls freely go nakéd when they are together in a room?
Nah, that was not me, never me. 😁

I was the girl who would wait for the room to be empty or wear my bra and pant from the bathroom, my body had always been Victoria's secret, just that it belonged to Bose, not Victoria.

I loved to cover up, I don't bathe in groups, I never watched people bathe either...

Then, I got pregnant with my first child, and I began to look for a female Doctor 😑 I did not find.
When I found Ajibola Hospital, I prayed it would be a female that would attend to me, no, it was Dr. Ajibola, and he was not old, he was young, bald, with a smiley face.

A month into my visits into the hospital, he announced I was his favorite girl! He started to call me "My learned friend" or "Miss. Bose"

Dammit! How will this man now shook face into my internal osofagus, in the name of dragging baby out! 🤦‍♀️

Every Wednesday, he gisted with me, said he loved hearing me talk, I started to "frank" face, to break the "friendship" na lie! He had befriended me by fire by force!

Na curse to be likeable 🫩

And when the day came, can you believe that I endured pain because, I'd rather endure pain than goan open yansh for my "friend" 😂😂😂

But when the thing hook, I went!!! 😑

Dr. Ajibola was still around when I got there, this man saw me and started laughing...
"Ah, see my friend o!"

Dammit again!
I say dammit!

Can you be professional Doc? 😭😭 Ayamn't your friend!

"Oya come lets see how dilated you are..."

Mess up!
How did I get here?
What did I do that landed me in this mess? (Make nobody answer, na rhetorical kwetion! 😑)

I will not bore you with the tales of him "checking" the interior of my osofagus!

That one did not pain me! I throway face, he left after announcing I was just 2cm.

Then real labour started and the two semi-midwives were playing tinko with my life before Dr. Ajibola's arrival.

That was how this young guy, a resident arrived! I had seen him a few times during my tos and fros at the hospital...
This guy did not even knock, he just entered, he saw me propped like goatmeat garnished with cucumber, he shook head "ẹ fun girl yi ni episiotomy, ẹ ma jẹ ko tear..."

At that point, I vexed and covered legs (I. AM. NOT. KIDDING! 😂😂😂😂 I pulled down my dress, yes! I wore a dress 🤣 I wore Ankara boubou.) I said "Mi o ṣe mọ..." I no do again!

The way these people grabbed my legs apart 😑😑😑😑 I swore to kìll everybody later.

I sha born the child 7 hawas later!

A few years ago, 4 or so, as part of the team of J27 widows outreach, we gathered widows for breast and cervical screening at one popular doctor's center, shey you remember that Dr. that dey say wí pé, he use to torchlight his patients, 😑🚶‍♀️

Na so we gather for the hospital, we the team and volunteers also decided to do the screening along with the widows.
I was on the queue until I saw that I was going to be directed to the Dr.'s office, I ran away 😂😂😂

Na only me no do screening that day 😂 when the kasala burst years later, I was quick to say "no wonder my spirit ran away."🫩

Luckily for me when I had my second child, they were all women, even though those ones too were gossiping about me... I dey push, you dey gossip about me say "I no fit pass this age"

Na why I just stop for two children 🫣I no open again. 🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️

Yours truly but not truly yours 😑

#OkoIyaWon
#TheHusbandofTheirMothers

[Bose Bamidele @OkoIyaWon]

"Ok" I said.
"Thank you." He added
"Thanks" I added
"Ok" he nodded
"Bye" I said and turned around...

Goodbye my lofa!

Daz how Azeezat the singer released "Hold On" and it spoke to my soul! 🥹

Anyways, Tenks!

Yours Truly But Not Truly Yours 🥹

#OkoIyaWon
#SerialLover

[Bose Bamidele @OkoIyaWon]

My Shortest Relationship!

It lasted for Tiri days!!! As in, 72 hours!
Tiri days before, he begged me, cajoled me, cornered me to be his gehfren, the mother of his unborn children, and I agreed, only for him to call it off after 72 hours!

What did I do? 🤷‍♀️
Ok, let us start from the beginning!

It happened 25 years ago, I was a baby girl of 16, I was a Prefect of Royal Comprehensive College, and he was Afeez Ganiyu, the Head Boy of Royal Comprehensive College!

The love was not like what I felt for Ayo, iyen the love of my life, in fact, before the toasting, I only saw Afeez as the very brilliant boy that he was, and he had good pink "limps", I also noticed him every Friday because he led the assembly and made us say "Robbi zidni ilma..." many times.🙏
That was it... I had plenty Tilapia to fry, Afeez was not one!
Even when he winked at me one afternoon during our lunch break, I quickly excused it to be "Apollo".

Until one Friday! The Friday that changed everything...

I was in my class when Afeez's best friend, Ade-something (I forgot the name the moment I got to this paragraph, I'll come back to it!🥴)
"Bose" he called from the door, and I looked up at him. I was in SS2, they were in SS3, he beckoned and I rose and walked to him.

"Afeez wants to see you." He said simply.
I frowned.
"Afeez? Head Boy?" I asked, puzzled, cos why?
"Yes." And he turned swiftly, nodding that I should follow. I did.🚶‍♀️

Afeez was waiting in an empty class, looking out of a window like Jonathan Swift, impeccably dressed as always, his pants exactly where it should be on his waist, his back was turned as we entered the class, he looked like a poem.

His friend (the one whose name still hides) coughed, Afeez turned and smiled. Afeez had a beautiful smile, a very beguiling smile, I didn't smile.
"Bamidele" he called and smiled again, this time with his eyes... this Adeboy sat far away while I walked up to Afeez.
To my shock, Afeez pulled out a chair for me, nodded at me and I sat, he perched on the desk and looked at me.

Ladies and Mentlegens, Headboy sha toasted me o, and as he unleashed his obviously rehearsed lines which included "two brilliant minds coming together as a couple", I only thought of how to start acting as the First lady of Royal College and how to tell Kemi Job.

Thirty minutes later, we were a couple! Our love was sealed, witnessed by this guy whose name keeps eluding me everytime I think of him.

We left the class, we walked off in different directions.
I left my class as the kinikan Prefect, but I returned as the First lady!

The next day was Saturday, Afeez visited and we hung around the street, talking.
Guy even asked me to greet him properly as his girlfriend!
"How?" I asked, genuinely clueless.
"Hug me" he told me "That is how to greet your boyfriend"
I managed to hug him with my head!

Relationship is sweet o 🥹🥴
"See you on Monday my dear" this old man said to me when he left and I soared! 😂

Guys, I took extra care the next Monday, that is, 72 hours after I became First lady, I applied extra Robb on my lips and lined my eyes!

I noticed eyes following me, I already told all my friends that I was in a relationship. Afeez's classmates were following me with bad eyes everywhere, especially the ladies.

Toh, na the same guy wey call me on Friday called on Monday afternoon.

I smiled and ran to meet my lofa, iyen Afeez Ganiyu, he wasn't smiling. He didn't pull out a chair, he looked at me in the eyes briefly, then dropped his face.

Again, the rehearsed speech...
"Unfortunately, news of our relationship has traveled and my reputation is at stake, it seems you told everybody!"

Wait, Afeez will sacrifice love for reputation!!! 🤔🤔
Our love was not worth fighting for???🤷‍♀️
Shey is kelekele love Afeez wantu do ni?😲
Me I don't know how to do kelekele love!!!!🤧🥴
Patapata, they will rọ Afeez lóyè, as in, dey will dethrone him, but there'd be love waiting 🤷‍♀️🥴🥹

"We have to stop this." He said.

😐

[Bose Bamidele @OkoIyaWon]

I remember something that happened to me in 2008 😂😂😂😫

Unilorin 300 Level, 2nd semester, I lived in Gaa Akanbi with my two friends, three of us were in the same department, English, but I majored in literature and they majored in language, they had their courses together while I had mine separately, meaning I went to school alone most times while they went together.

Now, as a semi demi broke student, I wasnt always able to dispense cash, sometimes my friends would "raise" me...you get?

So on this day, I went to school, without having enough money, something about me is, I cannot miss a class, I have a brain that retains everything I see and hear, but I cannot read, so, I do not miss classes. I went to school, hoping a miracle would happen to bring me back from PS to Gaa Akanbi!

Omo! 😂😂😂

After classes, I loitered around with some other friends in their hostels, but pride did not let me open my mouth to ask any of them for money!
That evening, I eventually left, cos it was getting late.

I was able to pay #50 out of PS to Tanke, now I had to walk from Tanke to Gaa Akanbi and then to Olorunsogo. Before then, I had not been walking like the Israeli that I became later in my life, so I was dragging my feet, the Kito was not even helping.

My friends were calling, I just told them I was on my way.

One hour later, I got to Tanke Junction, my thighs were becoming stiff, it was already dark, and a police van ran past, then stopped and reversed. 😂😂😂😂

Guys! Daz how Police "catch" me😂😂😂😂(This is so funny!)

"Stop there!"

If you know me, you know how I feel about policemen.
I stopped. They didnt alight, one of them just looked out of the truck at me, I'm sure he couldn’t make out my face o, but his next words were:
"Fine geh where you dey go?"

"Home" I told him.
"At this time of the night? Where you dey come from?"
"School."
"Which school?"
"University of Ilorin"
"En en... OK o. Careful careful o"

They drove off, I hissed and lifted my kito-ed feet to continue my journey, only for this van to reverse again.

"Where you dey go?"
"Gaa Akanbi" I told them.
"Ah, oya enter, na our station be that."

Police?
Police motor?
Police man?

I was thinking of all the things I knew about Police when one of them jumped down from the front, he went to the back of the truck and joined the lone officer there.
Another got off and held the door for me, I got in, and was sandwiched between the driver and another officer.

I sha collected kamu say "all die na die" and the journey from that Tanke Junction to Gaa Akanbi began.

These men started chatting o, I did not hear anything, I did not know when I agreed to follow them into the station and play with them as the teletubby that I am, before going home. I had no idea.

I only noticed that we got to Gaa Akanbi and these men were going to drive me into their station.

That was when I came back to life 😂😂😂😂
Oh God of Mephiboseth 😂

Daz how I began to shout

"let me come down!"
"I say I want to come down!"
"I don't want to enter!"

They were shocked at the sudden outburst, the calm nodding girl was now swinging fists.

"Calm down na, shebi you say you will play with us? Are you not a big girl?"

"I want to get down!!!!
"Let me get down!!!!"
"I am not a big girl!!"
😂😂😂
I don't even know what got over me!

That was how the driver looked at me and said "weere leleyi o, kii se big girl."

I swallowed the insult, the officer beside me quickly got down, I jumped off and ran off. I didnt look back, but I was sure they waited at that entrance for far longer than usual.

I should comman play with you ninu station?
As per?
God abeg 😂

To the glory of God, I was already in Gaa Akanbi, I only needed the last push to Olorunsogo 😂😂😂

Omo! I have done things in this life!
But e go be ✌️

Yours truly but not truly yours 🫣

#OkoIyaWon
#MrsButNotMarried