So far, based on all the feedback, the lineup is as follows (NB this isn’t my list, but from everyone that has contributed):
GK: André Onana - Nearly unanimous. The most expensive “upgrade” became the most common name in every list.
Butterfingers.
• RB: Matteo Darmian - Recurring low-cost, low-impact full-back pick. Forgettable.
• CB: Maguire - The £80m defender who symbolises the post-Fergie decline for many.
I quite like Harry, but he is on the list of many.
Lindelof would have been on mine because I have PTSD thinking about his first game.
• CB: Eric Bailly - Frequent injury-plagued, high-ceiling/low-output centre-back.
Unreliable.
• LB: Tyrell Malacia / Alex Telles (interchangeable in replies) - The left-back slot is consistently filled by one of these underwhelming options.
Rotten.
• CDM/CM: Manuel Ugarte - another expensive flop who came in at the start of INEOS’ best-in-class era.
Has played better since he’s been out.
• CM: Donny van de Beek - The classic “arrived with hype, left with almost nothing” name.
Cried on arrival. Smiled when he left.
• CAM: Mason Mount - Big wages, constant injuries, minimal impact.
Nice fella. Great golf swing. Occasionally plays football.
• LW: Jadon Sancho - One of the three absolute non-negotiables (with Onana and Antony).
FIFA champ.
• RW: Antony - The other absolute non-negotiable. £80m+ and a punchline.
You spin me right round….
• ST: Alexis Sánchez (or Memphis Depay in some lists) - High-profile, high-wage, low-output striker who features constantly.
The piano man.
Although this appears to be a 4-3-3, Amorim has stepped in as manager to play 3 at the back.
We shall suffer with this team.
No Youth.
No Courage.
No Success.
Still beats the team that played against Bournemouth.
Jason Wilcox has just called and appointed himself as Director of Everything.
Crazy how disconnected I feel from footy these days with United being so shite. Genuinely don’t care about other results, don’t have the same motivation to watch football at all