Alan Morton

PhD researcher in film, funded by M3C/AHRC. Director of @TheSocialCinema. Likes coffee and cats.

[Alan Morton @OrganisedCrisis]

@CardboardCut0ut They didn’t even ask the cat when he got so handome or if those were his dabbers! Those filmmakers have never been adopted by a cat in their lives.

[Alan Morton @OrganisedCrisis]

@CardboardCut0ut Did you pull on the rope and make a noise like you’re struggling because he’s so strong? He likes that part.

[Alan Morton @OrganisedCrisis]

@CardboardCut0ut Me, every 5 minutiae: ooooh! That’s a nice jumper.

[Alan Morton @OrganisedCrisis]

@ZBayatti My “friend” greatly appreciated this message. He also apologises if he seemed thirsty. Love to you and the Harvey massiv!

[Alan Morton @OrganisedCrisis]

What does it mean when you have more bad days than good days doing your PhD? Asking for "a friend" who is currently pulling their hair out.

[Alan Morton @OrganisedCrisis]

@hayley_vann This guy want to know where the lady who played Deidre with him has gone.

[Alan Morton @OrganisedCrisis]

Amount of time needed to compose what you actually want to say in an email: 3mins

Amount of time needed to pad out an email so that you don't sound too pushy/ needy/ arrogant/ unfriendly/ too friendly etc: 7 to 10 business days.

[Alan Morton @OrganisedCrisis]

I just yelled “read the room! It’s a goddamn pandemic” at an online report form I’m filling out. That is how my day/ week/ month/ life is going.

[Alan Morton @OrganisedCrisis]

Shoutout to all those struggling with their mental health and general self-worth. It is truly exhausting dealing with these things and can feel isolating or like you’re a burden, but that’s just the faulty wiring in our brains. Remember to talk to those good people who can help.

[Alan Morton @OrganisedCrisis]

One thing I have learned whilst ploughing through 30 years worth of reviews of Sundance films is that male journalists are continually (and often inappropriately) horny and utterly unable to hide that fact. I'm fairly sure most of them are writing the reviews with their genitals.

[Alan Morton @OrganisedCrisis]

@clairemjenkins I feel like I’ve been flayed!

[Alan Morton @OrganisedCrisis]

I'm about to wear some trousers which aren't loungewear. I'm worried that they're going to hurt my legs.

[Alan Morton @OrganisedCrisis]

@JakeOHarvey @ZBayatti Did you know that Wilford Brimley was NOT a native French speaker as well. Flawless, flawless accent.

[Alan Morton @OrganisedCrisis]

I don’t usually weigh in on these hot button issues, but I feel that I do need to say something in this instance... Hard Target is a masterpiece of filmmaking.

[Alan Morton @OrganisedCrisis]

@CardboardCut0ut Sorry, can’t talk... going to collect a tiger.

[Alan Morton @OrganisedCrisis]

@CardboardCut0ut Sorry, can’t talk... going to collect a tiger.

[Alan Morton @OrganisedCrisis]

I was going to say that I’m at the “was it something I did” stage of the pandemic, but to be fair to COVID, that stage started in about 1982.

[Alan Morton @OrganisedCrisis]

@CardboardCut0ut It get’s funnier each time I look at it.

[Alan Morton @OrganisedCrisis]

Once again @SoulJazzRecords are proving that their artwork game cannot be bettered. Yum yum yum!

[Alan Morton @OrganisedCrisis]

Does it count as making cold brew if you just forgot to boil the water? No particular reason for asking... [cue nonchalant whistling]