Pige

Fuck u

[lunn ✶ @lunncrf]

a primeira solução que me ocorre sempre que algo dá ligeiramente errado

[AYANNY @gaygirldiaries]

“i dont need to drink or smoke to have fun” okay congrats btch you can drive then

[mahrukh @parhloumahrukh]

things i’d rather be called instead of a “wifey material”
-gold digger
-misandrist
-cat lady
-lesbian
-evil witch
-self centered

[av glock🧩( -_•)╦̵̵̿╤─ @futonchill]

you should always smell nice cuz the first hole you penetrate is someone’s nostrils

[🐝 𐚁 ⋆ @beyoncescunt26]

paris was iconic for this

[REINNAAAA 🦉𐃈 @glitteryfem]

because y’all don’t

[redrum @griffisu]

apple watch app that detects when your heart stops and auto uploads a photo of half your face half xxxtentacion to all your socials

[law dog, esq. @ggooooddddoogg]

stoner in 1976: i just smoked 12 joints in a row and now i like bluegrass music 10% more

stoner in 2026: i did a dab and gave myself wernicke’s aphasia

[Definitely Nick @other_st_nick]

They should invent a coworker that knows stuff

[gem @giannascoli]

if alcohol can shorten your memory imagine what alcohol can do

[harlan @morepain4harlan]

flaked on the function to smoke weed alone

[^ ^ @bitesyourneck]

your misbehaving boyfriend isnt funny to me take him to the shelter and have him euthanized

[Wopavelli @TheWopObama]

Taking a shit on the clock at work for so long that I come out and my boss is 20 years older like interstellar and I start crying

[petal @ctrlpetal]

oh, she's writing more of that corny, verbose trash, overwrought w similes and metaphors, which she'll sing in her irritating voice over some stale synth-slop. it'll perform as a hit even if nobody in the real world will actually listen to it. how exciting!

[brady @zipoffs]

dropping my old car battery off in front of an autozone in the middle of the night like a baby at the fire station

[grace @gracefishlove]

Sorry about the mean things i said when i was right

[angie @fatmustyincel]

Yall remember how bad the police sirens used to scare u after ur first few kills 😭😭

[xavier @zorobutt]

just bent my adhd over and creampied it deep in the ass #ChoresDone #GotAMealIn #Showered #BrushedMyTeeth

[penny @xXMeatGodXx]

are you wiping what im shitting?

[Jake Flores 🇵🇸🇲🇽 @feraljokes]

Finally saw Obsession. They should make movie theaters where you can pace around and smoke