Killian Jones

I'm a dashing rapscallion..what else could you possibly need to know, mate?

[piratejokes @piratejokes]

What is a pirate's favorite type of humor?
Sarrrrrrrr-casm!

[Killian Jones @PirateCaptnHook]

@QuiteTinkerFae how did you go from burning leather to hot dogs? #iwontfocusonwhatyouredoingtomyclothing #ideserveit #Illbutyouahotdog

[Killian Jones @PirateCaptnHook]

@imnotthesavior bloody hell swan. Perhaps you have a problem #hotchocoholic

[Killian Jones @PirateCaptnHook]

A ring doesn't make another love you any more or any less. If you think otherwise #fail #youwrong #checkuoitsekf

[Killian Jones @PirateCaptnHook]

@theswanduckling @TheDarkHound I'm not the one panting like an over zealous fur ball #scuseyou

[Killian Jones @PirateCaptnHook]

@theswanduckling I will kill you. And the boy #cutewonthelpyounow

[Killian Jones @PirateCaptnHook]

@TheDarkHound #itscalledrum #ifyouregonnaalludetoyoursenseofsmell #perhapsyoushouldgetitright #baddog

[Killian Jones @PirateCaptnHook]

If I roll down the window will @TheDarkHound stick his head out #itsadogthingright

[Killian Jones @PirateCaptnHook]

Only a bloody fairy would refer to two kids as commitment issues #nopewrong #youtried

[Killian Jones @PirateCaptnHook]

@QuiteTinkerFae you turned my hook into a sextoy!? #thatsnotright

[Killian Jones @PirateCaptnHook]

@QuiteTinkerFae I know swan have it to you #doesntworkthesameifitsnotattachedtomelove

[Killian Jones @PirateCaptnHook]

HOOK just doesn't have that same ring to it when said appendage is missing @theswanduckling @QuiteTinkerFae #sideeyingyou

[Killian Jones @PirateCaptnHook]

@QuiteTinkerFae can i come home yet, love? #sleepingoutsidesucks #Jollyispissedatmetoo

[Killian Jones @PirateCaptnHook]

Going to the rabbit hole because #captainhappy has become #captainsad #doescrispinlookmorelikemeorpan #helpacaptainout #detectiveHook

[Killian Jones @PirateCaptnHook]

#allineedisHarold #saveharold2k14

[piratejokes @piratejokes]

What's an indie pirate's favorite film?
Garrrrrrrrden State!

[Killian Jones @PirateCaptnHook]

#ismysonevenmine #hehaspixieears #andPanshaircolor

[Killian Jones @PirateCaptnHook]

if your relationship is diminished by the others inability to label it perhaps it wasn't a relationship to begin with #TLsucks

[Killian Jones @PirateCaptnHook]

all marriage is IS A BLOODY PIECE OF JEWLRY. #alreadyhavearing #dontwantanother #morelikeaweddingdogcollar

[Killian Jones @PirateCaptnHook]

Swan I need Harold. Unless you want to be responsible for a #divorcenotdivorce #itsbloodycomplicatedokay @theswanduckling