Carlos Not Cheecken

Hola chicas, I am not cheecken.
Background via lovely chica Michaela Hansen of @ToursDeprtDaily.

[Carlos Not Cheecken @PoCCarlos]

∗∗∗∗...glurgle...∗∗∗∗

[Carlos Not Cheecken @PoCCarlos]

Hola chicas, come spend time weeth me and I'll be your ooh la la. #CarlosDanger

[Carlos Not Cheecken @PoCCarlos]

Don't reseest what your heart desires. Wheech I know ees #CarlosDanger! RT @PirateRedhead Oh my god, ewwwwwwww!!! Stay away from me, creep!

[Carlos Not Cheecken @PoCCarlos]

@PirateRedhead Don't be shy. I know you crave mac n cheese hot dogs, and #CarlosDanger can provide them for you.

[Carlos Not Cheecken @PoCCarlos]

Chicas, remember what #CarlosDanger says. You don't want a man who's all gleetter and no substance. Peeck a real man--me. Not a golden boy.

[Carlos Not Cheecken @PoCCarlos]

Finally, a chica who ees not hideeng her feelengs. #CarlosDanger knows what the ladies want! RT @MainStTilly GIMME ONE OF THOSE!

[Carlos Not Cheecken @PoCCarlos]

.@jostephenson78 Be gone, non-suave one! #CarlosDanger has no time for those who don't know the deefference between verbs and adjecteeves.

[Carlos Not Cheecken @PoCCarlos]

#CarlosDanger weell sateesfy your desteeny--and all your dreams. @TinkerbellDL @EyeOfMara

[Carlos Not Cheecken @PoCCarlos]

Chicas, you know you want what you just saw. #CarlosDanger @MsMainStFortune @MainStTilly @CarolynCrosson @WishinSnowWhite @PirateRedhead

[Carlos Not Cheecken @PoCCarlos]

I cannot be denied. Here ees a peecture of my weiner I was trying to show earlier. #CarlosDanger
http://t.co/fvyht0j6cG

[Carlos Not Cheecken @PoCCarlos]

She ees makeeng eyes at #CarlosDanger! ;) RT @MsMainStFortune *gives death stare* Nothing can take me away from my Deity. Stop trying fool.

[Carlos Not Cheecken @PoCCarlos]

@EyeOfMara Sorry, but I could not hear you clearly over that high peetch. But @PirateRedhead ees welcome to lay get hands on #CarlosDanger.

[Carlos Not Cheecken @PoCCarlos]

.@MsMainStFortune Don't deny your true feeleengs, mi cariña. You love a suave voice like mine. #CarlosDanger

[Carlos Not Cheecken @PoCCarlos]

Eet sounds like some teenny peetched idol hess some voice envy of #CarlosDanger!! @EyeOfMara @MsMainStFortune

[Carlos Not Cheecken @PoCCarlos]

Haters be hateeng. RT @jostephenson78 Pay him no heed. Carlos is but a foolish mortal. Bet he can't even hold his breath underwater.

[Carlos Not Cheecken @PoCCarlos]

Chicas, now that @EyeOfMara sounds weempy and effeminate, come flock to a real man. Me, #CarlosDanger. I am muy sexy and muy suave!

[Carlos Not Cheecken @PoCCarlos]

Do not worry about my wife, @PotCMaria. She weell always stand behind me no matter what troubles #CarlosDanger gets eento!

[Carlos Not Cheecken @PoCCarlos]

I hear @EyeOfMara's voice has been leefted too! Wheech means #CarlosDanger now has the suavest voice een the Keengdom!

[Carlos Not Cheecken @PoCCarlos]

RT @EyeOfMara To all my mortal followers with an AP! Come "see" my new face-lift for yourselves this Saturday! ... https://t.co/qEhbHZSN74

[Carlos Not Cheecken @PoCCarlos]

Hm, I deed not eentend to send peectures *TO* a bird... RT @nemoseagulls AHHHHHH!!!! WHY AM YOU SENDED AN PICKSURES TO TED?!? AHHHHHHHH!!!!!