"You don’t know exactly what you want until you start exploring but it’s good to be on the same page (…) and then if you want to change from there it’s fine, but you can really save a lot of hardships and headaches if there is clarity from the start.
Jess Ep.31
When women present as “hot” we often say they’re “expressing their #sexuality.” [when] expressing your sexuality would be having a true understanding of your body, wants, needs, #desires, limits, capacity for joy and being able to communicate that to a partner - Peggy Orenstein
PSA: When negotiating nonmonogamous relationships, you do NOT have to go for equality (ie, same rules for everyone). You can go for equity or fairness (ie, different rules for different people according to their needs and limitations).
Poly folks, please stop shitting on hierarchical polyamory. There is nothing inherently wrong with attachment hierarchies, attachment bonds are hierarchical in nature. Just make sure you treat your non-primary partners with the respect and care all humans deserve.
Not keeping your relationships beholden to the relationship escalator as a blueprint doesn’t mean you never get to make commitments or have changes that feel like escalations in individual relationships -it just means you take them up deliberately rather than “because people do.”
I wish someone had told me growing up that it's really good and healthy to spend *some* time apart from partners, regardless of relationship structure (polyamorous, monogamous, ambiamorous, etc.)
It gives you a chance to really miss them, appreciate them, and explore yourself.
Sometimes polyamory is living with contradictions of emotion.
like having the simultaneous thoughts: * I can't help being jealous, I'm afraid she's going to leave me, things keep changing!* * sniff* *They are really cute together though* ❤️
#polyamory#jealousy#newmeta
Unpopular truth:
Being around people who need nothing from you can be deeply rejuvenating. It is hard to fill your own tank when you are always around those who need your help. Make time for friends that ignite your joy, fill you with laughter, and recharge your inspiration.
Are you polyamorous and do you have children? Research has shown that the children of non-monogamous families are confident, healthy, and have more access to multiple role models. If you are polyamorous, what experiences have made parenting more or less difficult?