Laura

Opinionated, outspoken and sarcastic. Married and happy about it. Enjoys a good shit show. No dms, I’m extremely disappointing. Cheers 🍻🇨🇦🍻

[Laura @PourMeOne_more]

No one is horny 24/7. I think you might just be hungry hun

[Laura @PourMeOne_more]

Idk who needs to hear this but those kids are throwing your containers in the garbage. They are not in their locker at school

[Trey @treydayway]

One of the hardest things to do as an adult is to go back to work after a lunch break

[Laura @PourMeOne_more]

I’m pretty sure god never intended for us to have jobs in the summer

[Laura @PourMeOne_more]

If your man doesn’t think you’re a complete badass for the way you remember everything for everyone in this house you’ve turned into a home, you need a new man.

[Laura @PourMeOne_more]

Reverse cowgirl so he doesn’t see me order more crap off Amazon

[Maddy 👗👟👒🍃☂️ @MadHatterMommy]

Have you tried leaving your foot out of the blanket about it?

[Dan Regan @DanRegan_Comedy]

I'm in awe of people who cut up their entire meal before taking a bite.

[Trey @treydayway]

Fast food isn't that fast or good enough to be this expensive

[Granite Man 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 @GraniteDhuine]

At this point in the week, all of my tweets are basically cries for help.

[Laura @PourMeOne_more]

I wish I loved anything as much as semi retired men love being assholes to people on their Facebook groups

[Trey @treydayway]

It's probably too late to lose 50lbs by 2023

[Laura @PourMeOne_more]

Nothing a few cold coronas and some decent sex won’t cure

[Laura @PourMeOne_more]

@N_Doemostmuted Omg this

[Laura @PourMeOne_more]

@DGreeneOil A great time to be alive for sure

[Laura @PourMeOne_more]

When you wanna just drive for hours listening to music so loud you can’t think, but you’re also a parent with a mortgage and responsibilities and shit and gas is actual gold right now

[Laura @PourMeOne_more]

@JGirltotheNorth The struggle

[Social Outcast @SocialOutcast82]

Welcome to 40...you can go to work for the day or you can mow the lawn, but you can't do both.

[Granite Man 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 @GraniteDhuine]

And is your "sense of humour" in the room with us now?

[Forward March @RunOldMan]

Crazy is awesome . . . especially when it gets you a "not guilty" verdict.